


Have a Nice Life

by Scorpio_Karma



Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Anti-Bella/Edward, Anti-Emily/Sam, Anti-Imprinting, Anti-Obsession, F/M, Gen, Redemption
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-07
Updated: 2017-08-08
Packaged: 2018-06-01 00:12:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 47,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6493354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scorpio_Karma/pseuds/Scorpio_Karma
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Staying in La Push becomes too much for Leah, so she leaves. When she is forced to come back, her life becomes more difficult than anticipated. See the aftermath of her decision to leave and the irreparable damage imprinting can cause.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Decisions We All Regret

**Author's Note:**

> I have 12 chapters of this already written that can be seen on ff.net if you want to see what's next. Chapter 13 and beyond is still in progress, but I know where I want this to end, it's just getting there that's going to take patience.
> 
> If this first chapter doesn't quite fit the tone of the other chapters it's because this was originally a one shot that I decided to continue, the ending of this was supposed to be the end of it entirely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. That piece of intellectual property belongs to one Stephanie Meyer if you didn't already know.

Leah took one last look at her bedroom and a wave of nostalgia hit her. This room held many good memories for but just as those memories hit a sharp pain in her chest hit like a bulldozer.Most of her memories were of her and Sam, and her and Emily, and they all felt like lies. The two people she had not only loved the most but also trusted the most had betrayed her in the worst way possible. So with one last glance and a deep breath to push the tears forming away, Leah grabbed her luggage and left the only place she had ever known.

As much of a bitch she had been lately she was considerate enough to at least leave a note. It wasn’t a very detailed one but it sated her family’s fears while keeping them from looking for her.  
Being weak and wounded as never one of Leah’s strong points and normally she would just hold her head up high and make a nasty remark to keep them focused on something other than pity; but now they live together and she has to see them everywhere around town and happy at that. If everybody looked at her with pity before the love birds were everywhere they defiantly would now especially since she’s pregnant.

She could just imagine the looks on everyone’s face when they see the remnants of her and Sam’s broken relationship sitting just under her shirt and the condolences that follow it. That she could not take. People not only judging her but her unborn child too, who did nothing but exist.

She knew a baby was set back whether she and Sam were together or not, but now it’s especially hindering to her future because she would have to deal with the happy couple directly for the rest of her life. That wouldn’t do for Leah, so with all of her strength and all her selfishness she fled La Push to the farthest place she could go with her funds.

She ended up in a small town in a small town in Oregon called Wilsonville. It wasn’t much to look at but coming from a small reservation in Washington this place seemed like “the big city”. This city held her future and her freedom from all that she left. Maybe one day when she was good and healed she’d come back and face all that she’s avoiding head on with all the guilt, anger, and hurt that comes with it.

* * *

 

Sue Clearwater woke up that morning and already felt something wasn’t right, call it mother’s intuition. So when a mother feels something wrong and her heart fills with worry she does the one thing to sedate her fears and check on her children. As Seth’s room was closest, she peered her head in to his room first and saw him sprawled on his stomach in his bed perfectly fine. Next was Leah, who her worry directed to the strongest, but that might just be because of her recent heartbreak that has left a shell of the woman she raised.

Bracing herself for the worst Sue peered into her daughter’s room and found it empty. Searching for a logical explanation for this Sue then checked the bathroom _empty_ , kitchen _empty_ , living room _empty_ , front porch _empty_ , back porch _empty_ , she even searched the laundry room for good measure and still came up empty.

Her panic rising to levels she hasn’t had to in a couple months, Sue went back to Leah’s room to see if she came back there while she was searching. As expected the room was empty. With tears brimming in her eyes Sue walked in her daughter’s room and sat on her bed as though that were going to give her answers.

To her surprise, it did in a sense give her answers because she spotted a note on Leah’s night and she hope to god it wasn’t informing her of her daughter’s suicide. Taking a deep breath to calm herself, Sue then gingerly picked up the note and read it.

_By the time you read this I will have already left. In short the looks of pity and the haunting memories of what was once my life have become too much to deal. So I did the most cowardly thing, but also the only thing I could do short of killing myself, and left. I’ll miss all of you especially Seth, you were always a good brother._

_Tell Sam and Emily to have a nice life and it should be easier now that I’m not around._

_Maybe one day I’ll come back but for now this is goodbye for good._  
_Love, Leah_

Sue held the note to her heart as a strangled sob escaped her. Her only daughter has not only left the nest, but also didn’t tell her where she was going. Her first instinct was to call Chief Swan and file a missing persons but when she got on the phone with him, he informed that he couldn’t do anything because Leah is (A) an adult and (B) not in danger. He then offered his condolences and asked if there was anything else he could do for her, to which she replied there was nothing unless he could bring her daughter home.

After that phone call the startling reality that her baby girl was gone and not coming back settled in with her and caused her to still in her seat at the dining room table.  
When her husband came down and saw his wife he immediately knew something was wrong and was at her side immediately.

“Honey, what’s wrong? You’re never this still or quiet.”

Sue took a deep breath in and willed her tears away just enough to get out the necessary words. She looked over at Harry with sad eyes and spoke in a very soft low tone and said “Leah’s gone.” Harry looked over his wife’s face as he tried to digest what exactly she meant. Sue handed him Leah’s note to give him further information.

Harry looked at his wife solemnly as he too processed this new reality of not having their daughter in their life. “Did you call Charlie?”

“Yes, he said there was nothing he could do because she’s and adult and not in any immediate danger.” She got out mechanically,

“We could have Sam and the pack out looking for her; I bet they’d be better t tracking her down than the police.”

“True, but what will make her come back and if she comes back how will we get her to stay.”

“I don’t care; we’ll lock her in her bedroom if that’s what it takes.”

“Harry, be rational. As much as I like that idea it’s not a solution. We have to let her go, she left us by choice and the only thing we can really do is honor her wishes and hope that she comes back to us.”

“I don’t want to just hope, I want a guarantee that I’ll see my daughter again.”

“No one wants only hope, but unfortunately it’s all we get.” Sue took one last deep breath before she got up and busied herself with making breakfast. Harry just stayed still in his kneeling position before he had the sense to get up and sit into a chair.

* * *

 

A month passed by and the Clearwater house felt as though a ghost was living there. They never quite realized how much Leah was in their everyday lives until she wasn’t. The news of Leah’s departure circulated fast in the little community of La Push and all speculation as to why she left pointed to Sam and Emily. Granted they were right, but that still didn’t justify the inimical behavior towards them because the only people who truly had that right were Sue, Harry and Seth, who despite their own personal feelings treated them as they always do because it wasn’t directly their fault.

On the day of Leah’s birthday in which the Clearwater’s would have had their annual family gathering for her 19th year of life, Emily made a cake to give to Sue and went to see how her aunt was doing with her cousin’s departure. The guilt was festering at Emily more than when she accepted Sam’s imprint and wouldn’t go away like in usually did in Sam’s arms, so she thought this could ease her conscience by making sure her aunt was doing okay without her daughter.

Walking up those wooden porch steps and making it to the screen door, Emily timidly knocked on the door of the Clearwater residence. When the door finally opened she was greeted with the solemn face of Sue Clearwater. Offering a small sad half smile Emily held up her cake. “Can I come in?”

Sue opened her door wider and gestured for her to come through. Emily went straight for the kitchen to sit her cake down. She then turned to Sue and asked her the one question that has been overly used in her months since Leah left. “How are you doing?”

Sue took a deep annoyed breath and said same word to answer that question as though she were an automated recording. “I’m holding up just fine.”

Emily looked into the deep brown eyed of her aunt and could see that was a lie and her heart reached out to her. She crossed the distance from her to her aunt and hugged her because it was the only thing she could think to do.

The moment Emily made contact with Sue she stiffened under her warm affections because as much as it wasn’t Emily’s fault for Sam, she couldn’t forgive her for Leah.  
Sue cleared her throat and put Emily at arm’s length. She then gave her a small sorrowful smile. “As nice as this gesture is I can’t accept it, it’s too soon.” Sue paused in thought and then spoke again. “If we’re being perfectly honest, I may never be ready.”

Feeling rejected Emily looked at her aunt and said the only thing she could say. “Sorry, you know if I could change how it I would.”

“No you wouldn’t and I think that’s part of the reason I can never forgive you taking my daughter away.”

“I didn’t do this on purpose.” Emily said in a defensive tone she hadn’t had to use in months.

“I know, and I forgive you for the imprint. I forgive you for Sam. But I will never forgive you for taking the joyous, beautiful, strong daughter I raised and turning her into a bitter harpy who can never trust now.” Sue paused in thought again as she thought about the last time she saw her daughter.

“If I’m being completely honest with myself I lost my daughter long before she left and though I know that’s not completely you’re fault. A part of me can’t let go of the anger.” Her face hardened as she said her next statement.

“To see you deliriously happy causes even more anger to rise in me because I know how miserable my daughter is, was and probably will be for the rest of her life. You have ruined my daughter.” Sue took a calming breath and looked back at Emily’s scared face. ”Sorry Emily to lay all of this on you. I think it’d be best if you left.”

Emily just nodded to her aunt with tears running down her face and turned to walk to the door. Sue turned to Emily and said “Oh, one last thing Leah said tell you and Sam in her note. Have a nice life.” She said it in a tone full of resentment. That Leah had thought about their feelings when they obviously didn’t think about hers.

Not wanting to continue this conversation Emily just left right out the door even though she was confused as hell as to why Leah would wish a nice life on her or Sam.

It was a teary ride home for Emily as she really took in the damage that this imprint caused. Not only the damage to Sam’s reputation, her face and Leah’s soul but to her entire family.  
In great love stories when it’s them against the world, the world had always been wrong with their strict beliefs and prejudices; but now the world was actually in the right. Instead of her and Sam being Romeo and Juliet; they were more like Bonnie and Clyde, murderers who justified their actions with love as a template.

She knew she was lying the other times when she said if she could take the imprint back she would, but now for the first time she wished it never existed. She realized how much it did ruin and how much it took not only from her but others and none of it could be fixed. Her guilt sky rocketed so far she wasn’t so sure Sam’s loving arm would make it better. In fact it’d make it worse.

When Emily got herself composed enough to get out of the car and back in her home she had a remaining thought. Why would their ancestors cause such havoc to something as pure a love?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have this posted on my ff.net account of the same name and story under the same name. It goes to chapter 12, chapter 13 and on I'm still working. thank you for reading. ;-)


	2. Unexpected Return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leah must come back sooner than she planned.

It was just past midnight and Sue Clearwater was restlessly lying in her bed. It was always harder to sleep when Harry was away and now it was even more difficult knowing he would never come back. It had been a month since his passing and so much had changed; first her 15 year-old son had phased, second she now had a place counsel and third, there was an oncoming war with wild, erratic, newborn vampires. She was finally about to fall asleep when she got a call that she had been waiting for 9 months and 23 days.

* * *

 

Leah was just getting off the bus in Port Angeles with her 3 month old son in tow. She didn’t want to come back, but it was her only choice. Having only a high school diploma, she was only able to get a job at minimum wage, but she thought she’d be alright with her savings. What she did not factor in was hospital bills beyond basic check-ups, but her son, Daniel Jace Clearwater, had got pneumonia and the cost of the emergency room visit alone put her in more debt than she could handle. So, she let go of her pride and made the only decision she could think of. Come back home. It may not be what she want to do, but in order to keep roof over her son's head she would do anything, including facing her pain and the people that caused it because all of that paled in comparison to what was at stake.

She picked up the receiver at the payphone and dialed the number she’d known by heart her whole life and waited.

* * *

 

The shrill ring of the phone permeated throughout her room, taking her by surprise. She didn’t know why it startled her, with everything that’s been going on lately, a late not call was not unusual. After about the third ring she’s gotten herself awake enough to answer, so she picked up the receiver and heard the most wonderful voice she thought she would never hear.

“Mom?” Leah’s voice sounded so small and child-like, Sue couldn’t remember the last time she sounded so vulnerable, even when Sam broke up with her she remained strong. I guess that’s why her departure was such a surprise; she showed none of her pain to others, it was only her immediate family members who knew at least some of the pain she was in.

“Leah?” Sue asked as her voice cracked. Though she was nearly a hundred percent sure it was her daughter, she had to be certain.

“Yeah, it’s me, mom.” Sue had silent tears of happiness coming from her eyes, her baby girl had finally called her and she now knew she was at least alive. She let out the breath she had been holding and just listened to her daughters breathing over the line. After about a minute of their silent reunion Leah spoke again.

‘Hey Mom, do you think you could pick me from Port Angeles?”

“Yeah sweetie, I think I can.” She said this with the biggest smile she’s had in months while sniffling away the rest of her tears. “You think you can tell me where in Port Angeles you are?”

“Yeah that would be helpful huh. I’m at Greyhound Bus Station right out front. Oh and I’m not alone.” Leah sounded nervous at that last statement.

“Who are you with?”

“You’ll see.”

“Alright sweetie I’ll see you in an hour.”

“Okay, bye Mom.”

“Bye, baby girl”

* * *

 

Leah was sitting outside the bus station, Daniel in his car seat sleeping soundly next to her. She had so many blankets on him that she was slightly worried that he might suffocate, but the steady rhythm of his breathing placated her fears telling her that he was fine. Even after three months she still couldn’t stop staring at him in wonder; it seemed every new day brought a new thing to her attention. He of course was beautiful with his full head of dark silky hair and dark deep eyes she got lost in every time she saw him smile. Even though he looked a lot like Sam there was no doubt that he was hers; he had her chin, eyes, nose and best of all her smile; everything else he got from Sam, his darker skin tone, his cheekbone, pouty lips and even his forehead.

He started to stir from his sleep and Leah knew it was probably time to change and feed him, so she got out her portable changing mat and his diaper bag and got everything ready before he got too fussy and to minimalize his exposure to the cold August night air. When everything was set up she removed the hefty amount of blankets covering him and got him out of his carrier to put him on the mat. Daniel was not too happy with this change in temperature or placement and he vehemently let Leah know this with his cries.

“Oh I know sweetie, but Mommy’s gotta get that dirty diaper off you so you’re going to have to deal.” Leah cooed at him hoping to calm him a bit.

She got his pant off, exposing his bare legs to the night air and he liked this even less and cried even louder. With everything set up beforehand she was able to get him changed and back into his car seat securely covered in blankets his cries lowered in volume quickly. Knowing he would be hungry next she got out his pacifier to placate him while she put everything back into the diaper bag. When everything was in order she unzipped her jacket, got one arm out and pulled the strap of her tank top down along with her bra and got out Daniel with a many blankets as she could carry with him without dropping him and brought him to her breast to feed him. With a blanket to shield her breast and Daniel she finally laid back and relaxed for the moment being, which gave her time to think.

Though she was thoroughly disappointed to come back and face her demons again, she was kind of excited to see her mother and father and even Seth again. She hadn’t really realized how much she missed them until she heard her mother’s teary-eyed voice through the phone. Though she knew she wasn’t only leaving Sam and Emily, it didn’t really occur to her that there were more consequences to running away from her problems and not actually solving them. She still didn’t know how she was going to solve them; so far all she had was keeping Daniel from Sam as long as possible and when he confronted her, she was going to tell him to stick it where the sun don’t shine. She knew it was selfish to keep her little boy all to herself, but she also felt like that was the best way to protect him from the pain brought on by Sam’s rejection.

She was brought out of thoughts by Daniel’s lack of movement on her breast. She lifted the blanket and saw that he fell back to sleep, so she pulled her shirt and bra back up and moved to put him back in his carrier when she saw a set of headlights blind her and make Daniel stir, but she turned and shielded him before he could fully wake up. Knowing it was her mother she got up and waited for Sue to get out of the car.

* * *

 

When Sue pulled up and saw her daughter she nearly burst into tears. There she was, her baby girl, who she had nearly given up hope on seeing again at all let alone so soon. She took in her form and saw that her hair was cut from waist length to shoulder length and it looked very limp. Though she didn’t have a close up view she could tell her daughter was really, really tired. As Sue assessed Leah more she noticed she had gained a little weight and her hips were slightly wider, then she noticed that Leah was holding a small bundle in her arms and realized what Leah had meant when she said she was not alone.

Sue shut off the car pulling the key out of the ignition and took off right towards her daughter. When she got to Leah she pulled her into a hug so tight that Leah was worry she was smothering her son.

Trying to pull away from Sue’s grip as far as she could to protect Daniel, Leah started shout out of fear. “Mom! Mom! Let go! You might smother him!”

Quickly realizing her error, Sue pulled away from her daughter and immediately took in the baby in her arms. He was still asleep despite the commotion and was the most adorable thing Sue had ever set her eyes on. A smile crept on her face as she stared at her grandson and then she looked up at Leah and put her hand on her cheek looking into her eyes to speak.

“Seems you’ve been busy these last 9 months.”

Leah had to laugh at the understatement of the year. “Yeah, you could say that.”

“Come on let’s get you two out of the cold.”

They got Leah’s stuff into the car and Daniel safely secured in his car seat and headed back to La push. It wasn’t until they got on the freeway the Sue started to ask questions, she started out with a light one to ease her daughter into the heavier ones she wanted to know.

“So, what’s his name?”

Leah smiled at the mention of her son and looked back at him as she spoke. “Daniel Jace Clearwater”

“That’s a lovely name.” Sue smiled as she said this and then let silence take the air as she prepared for her next question.

“Is he Sam’s?”

Leah couldn’t speak for this question so she just bowed her head and nodded yes.

“Is this he reason you left?”

Leah looked from her lap to Sue’s eyes to answer. “Part of it”

Sue just nodded her head and looked back at the road. She was going to leave it at that and not look a gift horse in the mouth, but her curiosity and sanity wouldn’t let her so she cautiously approached her next question.

“Leah, why did you come back?”

Leah thought about the best way to answer this without getting into too much detail. She looked back at her sleeping son and answered the gods to honest truth, “I needed to come back, for him.”

This answer seemed to be enough for Sue and she smiled at her daughter. “Well I’m glad to have you back and I’m sure everyone else will be too.”

“Thanks, Mom.” Leah sat back in her seat and started to think about everyone she had missed and a small smile formed on her lips. The more she thought about them, the more she wondered how they were doing since she left without an explanation.

“Hey Mom, how are Dad and Seth?”

Sue tensed at this question; she had just realized her daughter didn’t know her father had died. Sue’s heart started to break all over again since she got the news at the hospital that her husband didn’t make it. Figuring the best approach with her daughter would be to rip the band-aide off, she divulged this information head on.

“Your father died of a heart attack a month ago.” She said in the flattest voice she could manage without her cracking.

Leah felt as though she had just been punched in the gut. She just sat in her seat trying to digest this information while simultaneously trying to breathe. She couldn’t believe her father was dead, she had always planned to come back someday and every time she imagined this, her father was one of the first to welcome her back home. She never even considered that anyone would die in her absence especially now since it was cut short. She fought the tears that were threatening to spill and tried to calm her thoughts, but then the tragic thought that she missed his funeral and never got to say goodbye pushed her tears over the edge and she started hysterically sobbing. All because she was weak and a coward she missed her father’s funeral, missed his last moments and never got the goodbye he deserved from her.

Though Sue wanted to comfort her daughter, she knew it would be much help. Leah always had a hard exterior shell that pushed anybody away the moment they started pitying her and she viewed comfort as pity.

The sounds of Daniel’s whimpering finally brought her out of her hysterics and she turned her attentions to her whimpering son. Without even a second thought Leah undid her seatbelt and climbed into the back of the van to attend to his needs. The moment he saw Leah’s face his whimpering stopped, apparently he just missed his mommy which was great timing because Leah needed to see her son to think straight, but that turned futile when she realized her father would never meet Daniel. Her perfect little bundle of joy would never meet a man who meant so much to her for her entire life.

Sensing her distress, Daniel’s whimpering began again and soon turned into a full fit. This brought Leah completely back from her train of though and she immediately started trying to comfort her son starting with his pacifier, which he adamantly refused; then she tried to rock his car seat as much as it would move in its place and this did absolutely nothing to calm his cries, she checked to see if he was wet and he was completely dry, she knew he wasn’t due for another feeding for at least two hours, she wanted to pick him up, but they were in a moving car.

His cries finally settled when the car was put to a complete stop. Wondering why they stopped, Leah looked around and realized that they were home. Pulling Daniel out of his carrier she got out of the car and took in her family home. She always imagined she’d be older and better put together the next time she came back, but things seem to never work out the way Leah wants them to.

Stopping next to Leah with her stuff, Sue gently placed her hand on Leah’s back and rubs it. “Come on, let’s get inside and you in bed” And with that Leah walked into a place she hadn't called home in a while and started the journey of dealing with her consequences.

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long, it's just annoyingly tedious to edit because the version saved on my computer isn't exactly the same as the one I posted so I have to go through both to spot the difference, like where's Waldo. I'll try to get more out faster until I'm posting completely new chapters.


	3. Seth I Used to Know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leah runs into Seth and he's not the same person she left.

It was 7 o’clock in the morning when Daniel woke Leah up. She had only gotten three hours of sleep because it took an hour after they got home for him to fall asleep, so she was pretty tired. With an exhausted sigh, Leah sat up from her childhood bed and swung her legs over to get to her crying son. As if on autopilot, Leah began her daily routine of changing and feeding her child.

When he was done eating, Leah decided it was time to leave the comfort of her room and go downstairs and face the first of the many people she left, Seth. She was surprised with all the commotion going on last night that he didn’t wake up, but he stayed asleep soundlessly in his room. She was really curious how he was going to react to her being back. On the one hand, she knew her happy go lucky brother would be ecstatic to have her home, but on the other she knew he’d be pissed she left.

She made it down to the kitchen expecting to see her mother making breakfast when she was met with a giant 6 foot 3 man with rippling muscles in only a pair of jean cut offs raiding the contents of her refrigerator. Startled by this sight, Leah clutched her son closer to her chest to protect him from this random stranger raiding her kitchen. She was about to scream out for someone when he turned around. She just stood there in shock as she realized that this man in her kitchen was not a stranger, but her 15 year-old brother, who she hadn’t seen in nine months and wow, what a change nine months made, Seth was unrecognizable. Last time she checked, Seth was a lanky little boy who could barely pass for 14, but now he could easily pass for 25 and it was very unnerving. This rapid change kind of reminded her of when Sam came back after being missing for two weeks and this made her worry more as to what exactly happened to her little brother since she’s been gone.

* * *

 

Seth had just gotten back from his eight hour patrol and he was literately starving. Patrols were going on a lot longer and frequently since they heard that Victoria was building an army to get to Bella and as much as he wanted Bella’s safety, he felt eight hours was a bit overboard even with the seriousness of the situation. He was in the middle of devouring some leftover meatloaf straight from the fridge when heard footsteps right behind him that didn’t match his mother. Curious as to who was in his house, Seth put the meatloaf back and turned to see who it was. When he spotted her, he couldn’t have been more stunned. His stubborn as a mule sister was standing right in front of his eyes, then he took her in more and realized she was holding a baby very closely and he was even more confused. She seemed very stand-offish and he was again confused when suddenly he remember that the last time he had seen her was before he had phased and he must look quite frightening to her right now. Deciding the best way to get Leah’s defense down a notch and to make sure his eyes weren’t deceiving him, he simply spoke her name.

“Leah?”

Hearing Seth’s voice seemed to snap Leah out of her fear induced trance. His voice was a lot deeper than she last remembered but there were still little hints of Seth within it and that seemed to calm her, for the moment. Realizing it was her turn to talk she racked brain with what she should say. It was a delicate situation and she had so much to say, but what should she start with? After overthinking for a full 60 seconds, Leah finally settled for “Hi”.

Hi? Hi? That’s all she had to say. She left with only a simple note to explain, a short note at that, and after all of that and coming back, the only thing she had to say was “hi”. Reigning in his anger, Seth closed his eyes and took deep breaths. He knew that getting angry at this moment would cause more problems and not just because he might hurt her, but because he knew how fragile Leah actually was. She may act tough and seem nearly impossible to hurt, but underneath the surface, she had just as many feelings as the rest of us. One little criticism and he knew she’d go into defensive mode and he wouldn’t get the answers he wanted or the closure he need for her actions, so with one last deep breath he opened his eyes and gave her the smile that she knew and loved.

“Hey sis, long time, no see.” He said dripping with snark.

Leah snorted. “Yeah well, I was planning for it to be a lot longer, so take your blessing where you can.”

“I’m gonna guess the baby you’re holding has something to do with why you’re back.” Leah’s eyes wandered around the kitchen away from Seth to avoid his comment. He took this as confirmation. “Mind telling me how you got a baby.”

Leah gave Seth an “are you serious” look, and then smiled. “I thought mom and dad already gave you that talk. Well I guess I could do for them, so Seth when a man and a wom-”

Leah was quickly cut off by Seth groaning quite loudly. “God Leah, I do not need that image in my head, sorry poor wording. What I meant to say was who’s baby is that?”

Leah stood straight and declared proudly, “mine”.

“Seriously Leah who’s baby is that?”

“Mine.” She stated firmly.

“Well then who’s the father?” He said in an octave higher than necessary.

“None of your business.” She said in a stubbornly tone that Seth was accustomed to.

“Well if it’s in my house it’s my business.” He said with obstinance reigning in his voice.

“Last time I checked, you don’t pay the bills, mom does. So, try again.”

She had him there and he didn’t have an adequate response, so he just glared in her direction. Leah could be so infuriating sometimes, especially when she was right. Deciding it was best just to take a step back, he left the house.

Once he was far enough in to the woods Seth stripped himself of his short and finally let out the anger he had been holding back, with a shiver in his spine he was no longer on two legs and his mind was no longer his own. He tried to keep his thoughts about Leah to himself, but he was too rattled by her return to accomplish this. Immediately his mind was flooded with inquiries about his sister.

_“She’s back?”_

_“And with a baby?”_

_“Wow, she didn’t seem like the type to get randomly knocked up.”_

_“Does your mom know?”_

_“Why did she come back?”_

_“Is she staying?”_

_“Does Sam know?”_

Currently only Paul, Embry, and Jared were phased with Seth and they just kept asking questions he didn’t know the answers to and they knew he didn't know them. They all kept speaking at once and he could figure out who was saying what. Fed up with what equivocated to mindless chatter, Seth had had enough.

_“SHUT UP! You keep asking questions even though you know I don’t know and if I knew the answers how do you expect me to answer them if you keep talking. God, I came out here to escape the frustrating mess that Leah brings and all you are doing is making them worse.”_

Stunned by this outburst from the happiest person they'd ever known, they realized their mistake _._

_“Sorry man”,_ Jared said.

_“Yeah, sorry we didn’t think about how you were feeling”,_ Embry started. _“So are you okay with all this? I know it’s a lot and you weren’t expecting to see her again.”_

_“I’m fine, I think, I’ll know more when I actually have a conversation with her and not whatever the hell we had before.”_

_“Yeah, well keep us posted. It’s bound to be the most interesting thing to happen on the rez and I do not want to be out of the loop.”_ Paul said as if he cared, when they knew he just want to see Leah get a rise out of Sam.

_“Please don’t tell Sam until we all have had a chance to speak to Leah, the last thing we need is a pissed off Leah, and then we’ll be at square one all over again.”_

Sam spontaneously showing up to talk to Leah might cause her to run again and that was the last thing Seth wanted.

_“Fine, I’ll try, but I’m making no promises. I might slip.”_ Paul said reluctantly.

_“Yeah, we’ll try too, but Seth, you know we can’t keep it to ourselves long so talk to her soon.”_ Embry said with an understanding tone.

_“I’ll try, but it won’t be easy.”_ Seth said with hope.

* * *

 

Leah just stood in the kitchen staring in the direction Seth had just left. Never in her life had Seth acted so petulant and never had he ever walked out on an argument, especially one as minor as the one they just had. Sure, she was expecting Seth to be mad and not hear her out, but she didn’t think he’d just leave. She was even more worried than before about Seth and wondered if Sam had anything to do with it. Seth was acting the same exact way Sam had when he came back: drastic change to his physical form, short fuse, and a weird possessiveness that made him think he had a right to know everything.

She was brought out of these thoughts when she heard the front door open and then close shortly after. Sue came into the kitchen holding plastic bags full of groceries, when she saw Leah just standing there with a look of shock on her face; she assumed she had just seen Seth. Putting the bags on the kitchen counter, Sue turned to her daughter and spoke.

“I see you’re learning things are exactly how you left them.” Sue eyed her daughter with a disapproving look that told Leah how disappointed she actually was with her abrupt departure.

“Yeah well, I guess I couldn’t expect everything to stay the same, I just hoped Seth would be the exception.” Leah said earnestly looking off into space.

“Well, you’ll learn the hard way that people don’t always stay the way we want them to.”

“I already learned that the hard way, I just hoped it’d stop at Sam." After a quiet pause Leah added, "but I guess nothing really ever goes my way.” Sue couldn’t really argue with that, if anybody had a right to complain about life not being fair, it was definitely her daughter.

Leah started to walk to the dining room to sit down with Daniel in her arms while Sue put away the groceries. “So any other changes I should know about or are you going to make me find those out the hard way also.”

Sue rolled her eyes at Leah, “I don’t know, do you? Or is finding out I have a grandson the only one.”

Leah knew her mom was going to mad about that, she just didn’t think it’d be thrown in her face so soon. Knowing he son picks up on her emotions, Leah tried to stay as calm as possible when she spoke next. “I’m sorry. Really I am, but I can’t change what I did nor do I really want to. I did what I thought I had to do and now, I’m doing the same, but I am sorry for hurting you and Dad and Seth. That I would change if I could, but I wasn’t exactly in the right state of mind when I left.”

Understanding these words, Sue stopped what she was doing with tears in her eyes and came to sit next to her daughter. “I am so sorry for what they put you through, if I could protect you from that I would, but if anything recently has taught me especially, not everything is in my control."

Leah gave her mother a teary eyed smile and hugged her. “Yeah, well I guess we all had to learn that sometime. I guess it’s better sooner than later.”

Laughing at her daughters very dry sense of humor Sue pulled back to look at her face. “I’m glad you came back, you have no idea how nerve wracking it to not know where you child is let alone if they’re even alive.”

“I’m glad I’m back too Mom.” And for the most part she was, but she still knew the looming black cloud that was Sam Uley and Emily Young still awaited to ruin all the comfort that returning had given her. She still didn’t know how she was going to react to seeing them; she didn’t have the option of leaving. Her car and most of her stuff still resided in Wilsonville, which brought her to her next request.

“Hey mom?” She felt all her nervousness from last night returning and still wasn’t quite sure how to ask such a big favor.

“Yes, sweetheart” Sue gave Leah a reassuring smile and it gave her the courage to continue.

“Um, when I left where I was at I kind of just took all I could grab with two hands so do you think you could at some point before the 30th drive me down there to retrieve some of Daniels essentials and maybe even my truck.” She gave her a timid smile and hope it wasn’t too much to ask for.

Seeing her daughter’s desperation, Sue decided to say yes without a second thought.

“Yes, we can do that and we’ll even get you truck, but we can’t go til next week." Leah released the breath that she was holding, thankful for her mother's generosity. Sue thought more about this and realized she had no idea where she just committed to taking Leah. "Where were staying?”

Leah clammed up at this, she didn’t want her mom to be pissed that she was close by, so she answered in the smallest voice she could manage while still being Leah Clearwater. “Wilsonville, Oregon, it’s like a little over four and a half hours away.”

Sue just stared at her daughter, anger boiling within her veins. She was only four and a half hours away and she had no clue. She assumed her daughter would go somewhere far like California or Canada, not a simple four and a half hours in Oregon. The sound of the front door brought Sue back from her reverie and she turned toward it.

* * *

 

Seth came in to the kitchen a lot calmer than before, and was determined to speak to Leah instead of setting her off. When he noticed his mom was there too his determination diminished a bit and he was thrown off by the extra person. As he thought about how to proceed he realized that his mother being there might help him get the answers he needed, someone to help keep the petty comments to a minimum.

“Sorry I walked out earlier; I just needed a moment to myself to process you being back.”

Leah smiled at her brother’s apology, “it’s okay Seth. I realize this is a lot to take in, but you have to understand, I’m not going to answer all your questions right away. I need time too, to process this all, it wasn’t in my plans either.”

Leah gave Daniel to her mother and walked over to Seth to give him the hug that was missing from their first encounter. After about 60 seconds of hugging, which was a record for Leah, she pulled back to gage his reaction. He seemed flabbergasted by Leah being affectionate, which she wasn’t surprised by, but motherhood had really turned her soft. She was still her same fierce self, but in the time of being pregnant and actually having to take care of a baby, she had learned that somethings just aren’t worth all the trouble, there are more important things to fight about and a simple hug from her family members was definitely not something to fight off.

Realizing Seth still hadn’t met Daniel, she decided that that would be the next step. “Do you want to meet your nephew?”

Seth smiled at this, before Leah seemed to be holding some random baby, but now was his nephew, he has a nephew. He just nodded in response and walked over with Leah to his mom. Leah removed her son from Sue’s arms and put him in Seth’s, who looked quite terrified at the prospect of holding a baby. His nephew seemed to be having a few issue with being passed around like a hot potato and made this known with a loud whimper and flailing his arms uncontrollably. Getting him comfortable in his arms, the baby settled down from his minor tantrum and Seth finally got a good look at him. He fell in love instantly; he always knew Leah would have a cute baby. He looked at his nephew’s features and noticed a lot of Leah in them and also some that weren’t hers but someone familiar. Putting that thought on the back burner he realized he didn't know what to call him, so he looked to Leah and asked, “What’s his name?”

Leah’s face lit up again and she looked at her son in Seth’s arms as she got to tell another person his name. “It’s Daniel Jace Clearwater, born on May 11 at Providence Medical Group in Wilsonville, Oregon after 17 hours of labor. Seems someone was just as stubborn as me when it came to making him do things he didn't want to.”

Seth laughed at her assessment; he didn’t doubt this kid was going to be the most stubborn person on the planet just having Leah as his mother alone. He stared at Daniel some more and realized the features that he didn’t recognize as Leah’s were Sam’s and his eyes nearly bugged out their sockets. He had no clue how he was going to keep this information to himself while he was phased; he already proved earlier that he wasn’t very good at it. Feeling Seth stiffen, Daniel started to squirm in his arms and started making little noises to indicate that he was starting to get unhappy. Not knowing what to do Seth turned to Leah and gave him back. Panicking at his new revelation, he realized he had to get out of the confinements of his home.

“I have to go” Seth gave his mom and Leah a tight smile and left quickly out the front door. He ran out to the woods and leaned against a tree to take deep breaths to avoid phasing. He couldn’t believe it; he was already having enough trouble processing that his sister had a baby, but Sam’s baby, this was bound to have some ramifications that were going to affect the entire tribe. Knowing there was no way in hell he was going to keep this to himself, Seth decide to walk over to Sam’s and just tell him to talk to Leah, to minimalize the possibility of Sam learning he has a son through someone other than Leah.

He always thought the day that he phased and his father died would be the most eventful day in his life, now he was learning to never underestimate the surprises the future could bring. With one last deep he got up off the tree and headed off towards Sam’s to have a conversation that was going to definitely piss off Leah.  


	4. Karma's a Bitch and Her Name is Leah

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leah and Sam have a heated discussion.

Seth was almost to Sam and Emily’s and he still didn’t know what to say, he pondered not saying anything at all, but then he thought about an angry Sam showing up on his doorstep and demanding things from Leah and pissing her off to the point that rationality was long gone in her head, and that didn’t sit well with him. It was inevitable that Sam was going to be pissed off and in turn piss Leah off, but at least this way it minimalized the amount of third parties in their business which in turn would minimalize the amount of anger thrown around these two.

Seth was right in front of the porch steps looking at the door ominously. He was pretty sure that the mention of Leah’s return would get Sam to see her immediately, but on the off chance he didn’t, Seth had no clue how he was going to get him to just go see Leah for the sake of it. He knew Sam would know something was up if he just outright and said it so he had to find a way to make the suggestion while he still thinks it's his own idea, true manipulation, and he wasn’t well versed in that.

Shaking the direction his thoughts were going, he realized he was overthinking it and he just need to give Sam half-truths, more like quarter truths because he still didn’t have a lot of the information. He finally climbed up the steps walked through the front door and was immediately hit with the scent of muffins and his stomach growled. Leah had derailed him from eating earlier and he was just reminded of it. He fought hard not to just go and devour all the food Emily laid out, but he had an agenda for this visit and plus he still didn’t feel quite right eating Emily’s food. He knew it wasn’t her fault, it was the imprint, but in his heart he felt it was a betrayal of Leah and he was always a good little brother.

He spotted Sam in the kitchen so close to Emily it was as though he were her shadow, and it was kind of annoying to watch. Seth didn’t know how Emily didn’t crawl out of her skin having someone that close all the time. He approached the couple and realized he didn’t factor Emily into the equation. What if she decides to go see Leah instead or, god forbid, they go together? That had the potential to more than likely end in murder. Luckily Sam knew that, or at least he should know, and his instinct to protect his imprint should prevent him from letting her go over there.

It was time to bite the bullet and just say what he had to say, no matter how much he thought about it, he couldn’t predict what was going to happen next. He put on the most genuine smile he could manage and spoke.

“Hey guys, how’s it going?” His voice was a little shaky, but it got the conversation going.

Sam was now right behind Emily with his arms wrapped around her; he guessed it was some kind of wolf territorial thing because he always did that when another wolf was around Emily. They just smiled up at him and spoke in unison. “We’re doing fine Seth, how ‘bout you?”

Seth grimaced briefly at the happy couple; that was another annoying thing imprintee’s did. It was as though they lost their whole identity and was replaced with a Stepford surrogate that never allowed you to be an individual. He loathed the day when he’d imprint and all his choices would be taken away from him to the point that he couldn’t think for himself. He’d seen it with the other imprinted couples, but none were as annoying as these two; at least Jared and Kim could somewhat think for themselves and go off do individual things they did before the imprint and it’s not like Quil spent all his time hovering over Claire even though we all knew he wanted to. There was a thin line between creepy and love with imprints and a lot of the time it was hard to tell.

Seth turned his grimace into a smile and answered their question. “Good, kind of, but mostly in shock and a little irritated.”

“In shock? Why? What happened?” This time only Emily spoke, much to Seth’s appreciation.

It was time, just out with it; all bets were off with what happens next. “Leah came back. I’m guessing sometime last night while I was on patrol because she was wearing pajamas when I saw her, meaning she slept over.”

Sam and Emily’s smiles were wiped right off their faces and they just stared at Seth wide eyed speechless. After about two minutes Emily stuttered out the question everybody wanted answered. “WH…Why di… did she come back?”

At least she had the decency to look guilty as she asked, Seth thought, and Sam seemed to be in deep thought about what he had just revealed. Though no one ever out right said it, everybody knew that they were the reason Leah left in the first place.

“I don’t know why she’s back, we didn’t really get to talk that much before our emotions got in the way.” And it was true for the most part, Seth knew that Daniel was the reason she was back, but he still didn’t have the specifics.

Emily just nodded her head nervously and went back into her own thought. Sam was still silent, but he could see the resolve on his face. He knew he had accomplished his goal and Sam was going to go see Leah, but Emily still seemed unpredictable at this point. After looking at her more closely he realized she was going nowhere near her, at least not anytime soon, which he was thankful for.

Sam finally spoke up, and in a very distant voice he said, “I’m just going to go outside for a moment. I don’t know when I’ll be back.” He gave Emily a quick kiss on her temple and was out the door before she murmured a “bye, love you” to him.

Seth couldn’t believe how easy that was; he at least thought he’d have to do more talking. He fought the urge to smile at his triumph and cleverness, but now was not the time, especially with what he just set in motion. He hoped Leah forgives him in the end; it was after all for her own protection.

* * *

 

Sam mechanically left his home and head toward a once familiar place. He couldn’t believe Leah was back. He knew going over there would probably be a disaster but he had to know that she was okay. He still cared about her and he felt an incredible amount of guilt for not only hurting her, but for also being the reason she left her home.

He wondered why she came back in the first place. In all the time he had known Leah, she never backed out of a anything; she was very stubborn, so if she made an irrational decision she stuck with it no matter the consequence. He used to love that about her, it made life very interesting and spontaneous; but now, being on the receiving end of that stubbornness, it wasn’t a quality he much liked.

He made it to her doorstep faster than usual with his enhanced abilities, before he could even give it a second thought he rapped at the door with more force than necessary. He heard Sue ask Leah to answer the door and waited for her slow human pace to get there. As he waited for her to get to the door he listened to the heartbeats inside and counted three, one of them beating faster than the others two. He wondered who else could possibly be there and why they were so nervous. He realized he was about to get his question answered because he heard their heartbeat getting closer to the door along with Leah’s. When the door finally opened, Sam was stunned for the second time that day because he saw that that very fast heartbeat didn’t belong to a nervous individual, but a baby that looked very distinctly like Leah and if his math was right, which it was, that baby was his. He was livid.

* * *

 

After Seth’s very abrupt and inexplicable departure, Sue and Leah decided they’d had enough drama for one morning and ate breakfast. When they were done eating Sue gathered both their plates and went to clean-up the mess made from cooking. Sue was elbow deep in dish-water when a loud rapping that sounded like it break the door interrupted her. _Those wolves still didn't know their own strength,_ she thought.

Leah was sitting in the living room on the sofa so enraptured with Daniel that she didn’t even notice someone at the door. Sue yelled loudly from the kitchen, “Leah, can you get that?”

Shifting Daniel to one arm, Leah called back, “Yeah Ma, just give me a second.” Leah stood up and carefully shifted Daniel to fit more comfortably in one arm and headed for the door. Nothing could have prepared her for what was on the other side of that door, but it looked like she was going to have to deal with it anyway.

Right in front of her Sam stood, first with a look of shock on his face and then that looked quickly faded into one of anger. She tried to shut the door in his face, but he was too strong and he flung the door open with such a force that it almost hit her. Quickly thinking of her son’s safety Leah walked as fast as she could to the kitchen.

Sue was standing at kitchen sink staring at Sam bewilderedly in her doorway. Leah came up to her and place Daniel in her arms. “Mom, can you take him upstairs while I deal with Sam?”

Sue looked at her daughter very warily, but complied anyways. As she passed Sam to go upstairs, she gave him a look that very clearly said what she’d do if he harmed Leah in anyway. Sam way too far gone to really take this threat seriously, but he decided to calm himself anyway. He didn’t need a repeat of the incident in the woods, another reminder of what a monster he actually was.

Leah closed the front door and motioned for Sam to follow her into the living room. She was beyond pissed, but if she had learned anything in the last few months it was that blindly acting on her anger would get her nowhere, so she sat down on the sofa and waited for him to speak first.

Sam paced back and forth her living room about ten times before he stopped and was finally calm enough to speak. Through flared nostrils he clenched out the words that were on repeat in his head the moment she opened the door. “What the Hell, Leah?”

Leah looked up at him with a look of indifference and she tilted her head to the side. “I’m afraid you’re going to have to be a little more specific, Sam because I have no idea what you’re talking about.” At the end of her sentence she gave a small smug smile.

This riled Sam even more and he let out a low animalistic growl. “You know damn well what I’m talking about! I have a son! A son you not only forgot to tell me about but also took off with.”

Leah gave him a death glare and spoke slowly and calmly to let him know who was exactly in charge. “I think you lost all rights to know about me and _my_ son the moment you threw away our three year relationship for my cousin, don’t ya think?”

Her eyes bored in challenging him to counter this. His anger diminished and was replaced with guilt. It always came down to that, he wish she’d just get over, but he knew her, she could hold a grudge til hell freezes over. He breathed out of his nose deeply and spoke remorsefully. “Leah, I’ve told you a thousand times, I’m sorry. It wasn’t-”

“Your fault, you didn’t mean to, it was out of your control. Yeah Sam I’ve heard it a thousand times and what I want to know is whose fault it is, who is responsible because it sure as hell isn’t Emily. She spouts the same shit you do and it’s just as irritating to hear now as it was before, so try coming up with a new line.”

He could see the fire in her eyes and he wish so much that he could tell her, but bound by duty tgo not. “You know it’s-”

“Complicated, right because that’s all the explanation I’m ever going to get.” She seethed in anger at her unanswered questions. What was he even doing here? How did he even know she was back? “What are you even doing here? How did you know I was even back?”

Sam got very apprehensive, he didn’t want to get Seth in trouble with Leah, but he didn’t have a plausible lie. “Seth came over to my house earlier. He told us you came back and didn’t know how to deal with it.”

She was going to kill Seth. Sam! Sam! Sam of all people he goes to about his problems! The man who ripped out her heart and stomped on it for good measure. She had had enough of this! “Sam, I think it's time you leave.” She said evenly and got up to lead him to the door.

“NO!” he shouted adamantly with power reigning in his voice. Realizing how rude he just sounded he immediately lowered his voice. “I mean, no, we still have things to discuss such as what we’re going to about our son.”

She sat down and crossed her arms over her chest. “I don’t know what ideas you have, but you’re getting nowhere near _my_ son.”

His anger came back; damn this woman could piss of a monk if she tried. “Damn it, Leah! He’s my son too! I have a right to see him!”

She stood up and walked into his personal space to get her point across very clearly, so she spoke slowly. “No. You don’t. You don’t get to see him. You don’t get to touch him. Hell, you don’t even get to know his name. So let go of whatever notions you had about being a father.”

He was taking in very deep breaths; he was so close to phasing it wasn’t even funny. “I’ll take you to court. I’ll fight you on this.”

Leah laughed at his statement and cocked her head to the side up at him. “Well good luck with that. You’re first going to have to prove that you’re the father with a DNA test because you’re not on his birth certificate and that’s a two week minimum for the results alone, not adding the time it’ll take you to make me actually let you do the test. Then when court actually hits, you’ll need a judge that doesn’t favor the mother because most do. And even if you’re that lucky, once a judge hears about how you left me for my cousin and then and threatened me in such a manner that I feared for my son’s and my safety, the case will be closed before you could even get a word in and if all that fails I can always just mention your father and how you're the spitting image of him down to the core, that should put the final nail in the coffin, don’t ya think?” Leah had the smuggest smile on her face because she knew she had him and that she was right.

Sam was stunned, never in his life had he known Leah to be so vindictive. She even mentioned his father, which was a very touchy subject with him and she knew to the exact extent that hurt him, which is why she used it. He shook his head vehemently. “You know that’s not true, I never threatened you”

“It’s true enough, that little display at the door even had my mother worried and she’s a hard woman to scare.” Leah’s voice was even and dripping with so much indifference t hat it kind of scared him. The woman in front of him was unrecognizable and he didn’t know how to deal with it. “This isn’t you. The Leah I knew would never be so cruel even to her worst enemies. What happened while you were gone?”

Leah snored at his assessment, it was kind of ironic. “What Sam? Find it off putting that someone would leave with no explanation and come back an entirely different person?” She laughed again, “Karma’s a bitch aint it?”

Sam looked in her fiery eyes and couldn’t believe she had turned into this person. “Do you really hate me that much” he whispered.

A stoic expression replaced her fiery one as whispered back, “What do you think?” They just stood there staring at each other, one angry and the other flabbergasted until finally Leah had had enough of his presence.

“It’s time to leave Sam.” She grabbed him by the arm and pulled him to the door. Once she opened it she shoved him onto the porch with more strength than either of them thought she was capable of. “Have a nice day.” She said with a sarcastic smile that said she meant anything but. She slammed the door in Sam’s face and turned to lean against it.

Her blood was boiling so much from that encounter that she was shaking. She knew she needed to calm down before going upstairs to relieve her mom from Daniel duty. She knew she played dirty, but damn it felt good, if she hurt Sam a fraction of as much as he hurt her, she’d be satisfied til the end of time. Well almost satisfied, unfortunately she had a conscience and it was giving her grief for the low blow about his father, but she put that away for now, her guilt was to have to wait because she had more important things to focus on. With one last calming breath she headed upstairs.

The moment she saw her son in her mother’s lap all her earlier anger was forgotten and her face lit up into a kilowatt smile. The moment Daniel spotted his mother he gave her a toothless grin that would floor even the meanest of all men. Leah took him from her mother and she was immediately in her own little world.

Sue wanted to ask about what happened with Sam downstairs, she heard a few shouts, but seeing her daughter so enamored in motherhood made her postpone that conversation. Remembering she still had dishes to do, Sue left Leah and Daniel alone to finish what she started earlier.

“Mama loves you and nothing will ever make me leave you. I’ll protect you til my last breath even if it’s from your own father.”

* * *

 

Leah had just slammed the door in his face and he had no idea what the hell had just happened. She was definitely changed and not for the good. She now hated him so much that she was willing to hurt him in ways that only she could. He trusted her with his pain once upon a time ago and now she had just used it against him. He numbly started to walk back home, Emily was who he needed; she always made him feel better.

He always knew the moment he imprinted that he’d lost Leah forever, but he never thought about losing her like this. She was not the Leah he once knew and loved and probably would never revert back to anything close to her. Guilt took over his mind again as he thought about the fact that he caused it. He essentially destroyed a wonderful woman that was way too good for him to begin with and turned her into someone angry and bitter enough to bring others with her.

He made it home a little slower than usual with all that was on his mind, but the moment he smelled Emily, his heart fluttered and his pain from earlier started to subside. Before he went inside to Emily, to have the entire world fade around him, he had one remaining thought that was probably going to stick with him.

_I have a son that I’ll never meet because my ancestors decided what I needed. What a bunch of assholes._

 


	5. I owe a Bear a Muffin Basket

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emily stops by to talk some sense into Leah.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's taken so long for this I was focusing on chapter 13 and other stories. As of right now chapter 14 is in the making, so there's 1-13 up on ["ffn"](https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11170000/1/Have-a-Nice-Life>%20fanfiction.net.%20</a>)

A month had passed since Sam went over to Leah’s and she was still pissed at Seth. He was trying to get back in her good graces and thought he was starting to make progress when he helped load her stuff from her apartment in Wilsonville, but that proved to be wishful thinking when they got back and Leah gave him the complete silent treatment. He preferred the screaming erratic Leah because at least then she’d have said her peace and eventually gotten over it, but with her completely silent he no clue how to make it better and even worse, he was waiting for the moment she decided to speak and unleashed god knows what.

Because Seth was Sam’s only link to Daniel, he was put on patrol constantly and always with Sam. Daniel, Sam found out his son’s name from Seth’s memory and already fell in love with it, It was one of the names they discussed when they were engaged and naming their future nonexistent children.

It was a little sad to see Sam scavenger through Seth’s mind for memories of Daniel when there weren’t that many to begin with. Sam was even going so far as to have some of the other wolves drop by the Clearwater’s to go through their memories, but it didn’t work. Leah was even less trusting of them and always made sure she was upstairs in her room with Daniel when they were over.

It was on one particular day when Seth finally had a memory to give Sam in hopes that he’d let up and he’d be able to get some actual sleep. _It was the day before and Sue was out running some errands. The only people home were Seth, Leah and Daniel. Leah was starting to feel off. She didn’t know if she was getting sick or not but she felt a fever coming on and her first thought was Daniel and how sick he got the month before with pneumonia. She decided to have her mother take him for a bit to lower his chances of exposure to whatever she had, but when she got downstairs the only person she could find was Seth. Choosing between her anger and her son was easy._

_Seth was downstairs watching TV while eating a Costco size bag of Doritos when Leah walked up to him holding Daniel. With his undivided attention on her she simply put her son in Seth’s arms and said, “Don’t drop him” then went back upstairs._

_Having no idea what to do with a baby Seth immediately got uncomfortable and started to shift him into a more comfortable position while trying not to get cheese dust on him. Seth immediately licked his fingers so he could use both his hands to properly hold Daniel because he was starting to get a little fussy with all of Seth’s maneuvering. When Seth finally had him comfortably in the crook of his arms he started to settle down. Seth just looked down into Daniels blue eyes and watch as he smiled up at him. Daniel started to move him arms uncontrollably trying to get to Seth. He was brought out of his Daniel induced trance when Leah very loudly came downstairs and grabbed her keys and headed for the door. Before she left she turned to Seth and said, “I don’t know how long I’ll be out. I’m just going to the store, do you want anything?”_

_Seth just stared at Leah dumbfounded. She had not spoken to him in nearly a month and now she was offering to get him things. He just shook his head no, better not push his luck, and she left. He had Daniel for a half an hour before Leah finally came back. She went to her room and when she came back to get Daniel from him she was wearing one of those surgical masks._

_He finally thought Leah was starting to forgive him so he decided to say something to her. “Daniel was really good while you were gone; he just kept smiling and trying to grab my face. He’s quite a cute kid-” He was immediately cut off by her taking off upstairs without even acknowledging that Seth was talking in the first place._

Sam reveled in the memories Seth had of Daniel, this was the most he’d been able to see of him since he first saw him in Leah’s arms at the door. Unfortunately that was all Seth had and Sam was immediately pulled out of his memories, much to his disappointment. He couldn’t keep going on like this, fathering from afar but what choice did he have. Sam phased into human form and headed home to Emily. She was the only person that could make him feel slightly better about this situation.

* * *

Emily had just finished setting out food on the table when Sam walked in with a grim look on his face. She immediately knew what was wrong, for a month he had done nothing but ache about not being able to see his son, he even went so far as to sleep outside Leah’s window in wolf form at night just to get a glimpse into his life.

Sam sat at one of the dining room tables and Emily came to sit in his lap. She knew this would sate his wolf which in turn would sate him. Emily looked Sam deep in his eyes and spoke.

“Did you get see anything new today?”

To this Sam smiled broadly. “Actually, yes. Leah let Seth babysit Daniel for a whole half hour. I got to see some of his facial expressions and things that make him smile. It was one of the most wonderful things I’ve ever gotten to watch, the only thing that would have made it better is if I’d actually been able to have been there myself.” Sam’s smile depleted and he looked at Emily earnestly communicating his pain. This silent communication was not need for her to feel his pain as she the imprint allowed her to feel it as though it were her own.

Emily got off Sam’s lap and made her way to the kitchen to make preparations for dinner. She was deep in thought while chopping up lettuce for a salad. She had had enough of Leah’s petty selfishness; Sam deserved to be in Daniel’s life just as much as Daniel deserved to have a father that was actually around. She knew how much it pained Sam to be like his father like this and knew that Leah knew it too, but Leah didn’t care. Emily decided that tomorrow she was going to have a talk with Leah about her behavior towards Sam and hopefully make her see reason so that Sam could see his son. They were best friends once and she hoped that would give her a better chance at being heard out.

* * *

It was about noon on the next day and Leah was tidying up the living room; having gone to her apartment to get most of Daniel’s things left the house messy a lot of the time mainly due to there not being a definitive place to put them. Daniel was out with Sue today to bond with her grandson, which is the excuse her mother used when she knew that she just wanted to give Leah a break. She knew Leah wasn’t still feeling great, if anything she had gotten worse. She still had a fever, but it had gotten to 103 today and she wondered how she was still standing, on top of all of that she could swear that she had a growth spurt, which last time she check, she was supposed to stop growing at 16. She was already tall for a girl, but now she would definitely tower over people. Though this growth spurt had its drawbacks, it did have some benefits such as toning out her post baby body. She had lost all of her baby weight without even trying and now where there was flab, muscle was starting to form, again without even trying, which was weird because she was eating more now than when she was pregnant.

Leah was in the middle of vacuuming when she heard someone knock at the door. Having gotten used to random shirtless men just walking in her house like they owned the place, Leah was very curious as to who was at the door. When she opened the door she was met with the one person in the world she never wanted to see, EVER.

Emily stood on the porch in front of Leah with a very timid look on her face holding a plate of muffins. She slipped inside the house quickly before Leah had a chance to slam the door in her face. Leah slammed the door anyways and turned to glare at Emily with the most menacing look she could give. Emily held up her plate of muffins as a peace offering. Leah forcefully grabbed the plate of muffins and walked right past her into the kitchen with Emily right on her heels. She tossed it on the counter carelessly and turned back to her bitch of a cousin.

“What are you doing here?” Leah gritted out in a tone that told Emily that she was not welcome in her house at all. She wondered if Seth pulled something like he did last month again and sent her over here.

Emily was expecting hostility, so she gave Leah a tight smile and spoke. “I came to talk to you about Sam.”

Leah glared even deeper at Emily; she knew her conversation with Sam last month wouldn’t be the end of that, but she didn’t think he’d be cowardly and stupid enough to send Emily. “I think you made it abundantly clear a year ago that any discussions involving Sam were unnecessary.”

Emily looked perplexed by her statement and wondered what she was getting at. “What do you mean unnecessary?”

“I mean that if you were really my family or even my friend you would have at least talked to me about you and Sam before you got together, but you thought you were above it all and let me find out by walking in on you two in the hospital.” Emily gasped; she didn’t know that’s how Leah found out. She thought Sam had said something because when she got out of that hospital Leah seemed to know automatically and cast Emily out of her life without a second thought.

Leah was fuming, getting out pent up anger she’s had since that day. “Tell me Emily, how long did you wait to make a move on Sam after we broke up? Or did you even wait for that? Were you two fucking behind my back the entire time and I was just none the wiser? Tell what did I do to you to deserve that kind of treatment because I can’t think of a thing?”

Emily was on the verge of tears as accusations were thrown her way, it wasn’t her fault, it was destiny, literately. She held in her tears, she had to be strong right now; she knew something like this was coming and if she let it get to her she’d never get to what she was actually here for. After several deep breaths she finally spoke. “It wasn’t like that Leah, you were never meant to get hurt. We didn’t do it on purpose.”

Leah scoffed at her. “What the hell did you expect, for me to just be sunshine and rainbows and even congratulate you on your relationship? You’re an adult Emily. And adults make adult mistakes with adult consequences; and if you can’t handle them don’t make them to begin with. And what the hell do you mean not on purpose? What other way is there to screw someone over without acknowledging who will get caught in the crossfire?" She stared at Emily expectantly and noticed, really noticed her scars. " You know I really owe that bear a muffin basket because your face is the only silver lining in this whole situation. You’re now so disfigured I’m surprised Sam stayed with you to begin with.” Leah knew she was digging low, but she wanted to inflict as much pain as possible.

“So are you going to answer my questions? What do you have to say for yourself?” Leah was yelling at this point, all thoughts of calm were long gone.

Emily swallowed hard as she spoke her party line since the whole imprinting debacle. “It’s complicated.”

Leah rolled her eyes at her response. “Typical. I don’t know how complicated screwing your best friend’s boyfriend can be, but I’ll take you word for it. You know I always wondered what it was about you that took Sam away from me. It was easily not you’re looks, I’ve always been prettier than you been before the bear attack and you are definitely not better than me in bed. I would have thought it was that you were a better person than me, but if that was true you and Sam would have never been together to begin with.”

Emily was starting to get frustrated with how Leah was describing her and the circumstances surrounding her and Sam. She hated that in the eyes of others her imprint was invalid in some way and she was the whore of La Push for simply following destiny. Even worse, she was pointing out some of her own insecurities she has with Sam. Emily knew that if Sam had a choice he wouldn’t be with her and pointing out the reasons wasn’t helping matters.

Emily was done with the direction this conversation was going and decided to steer back to where she had originally planned. “Leah I didn’t come over here to hash out old crap. I came here to talk about you letting Sam be in his son’s life. Your son deserves to have a father and you’re being selfish and petty by letting something that happened in the past _with you_ , take away his chance at having a father.”

Leah just stared at Emily dumbfounded; she couldn’t believe she had the nerve to criticize her especially since she was the reason her son was fatherless. It took all Leah had not to murder her cousin in her kitchen right then and there. She narrowed her eyes at Emily and spoke very slowly and menacingly. “Let me tell you this. If anybody is to blame for my child being fatherless it’s you and your inability to find your own man. You could have had anybody, but you decided to screw _me_ over, your own blood and best friend. So I don’t think I should be taking parenting advice from a backstabbing bitch like you.”

Leah turned from her cousin and grabbed the plate of muffins and dumped every last one of them into the trash. She turned back to Emily and shoved the plate into her stomach. “Here. I wouldn’t want to take something that’s not mine.” She said harshly while Emily just stood there frozen at Leah’s brashness.

Leah then walked past Emily towards the living room. She stopped at the vacuum and turned her head towards Emily, who was still frozen in the kitchen. “That was your cue to leave. If you still here in five minutes I’m calling the cops.” And with that she went back to vacuuming the living room.

Emily mechanically walked out of the Clearwater home. This did not go how she was planning in anyway. She hoped that their history before Sam would have made her more willing to listen to her but it did the exact opposite. She didn’t even get far enough in the conversation to argue her point. Emily drove home with no clue how to get through to her cousin, she was a different person and she wasn’t equipped to handle this new person.

* * *

Leah ripped the cord of the vacuum from the outlet. She was just so pissed, how could Emily think she’d listen to anything she had to say? Didn’t she have any common sense? That’s what pissed her off the most, she didn’t think she had done something bad enough for her to stay mad at her for all eternity. She didn’t get how much she had violated her trust. She just thought she need some time to get over, but didn’t see where the real crime of her actions were. It wasn’t the act of her being with Sam as much as it was the betrayal on both their parts and for some reason they both couldn’t see that. How do they think she’d ever be able to trust them with her son if she couldn’t even trust them to be faithful to her?

Leah was starting to get so angry that she was starting to hurt; it felt like her bones were breaking but evidence showed that they weren’t. _Must be growing pains_ , she thought. She sat down on the couch trying to catch her breath, but she was sweating bullets.

* * *

Seth entered his home after his patrol shift and saw Leah hunched over in pain on the couch and was immediately alarmed. Seth ran quickly over to aide his sister and take her to the hospital if needed. He kneeled beside her to assess what was going on.

“Leah, what’s wrong? You look like you’re in pain.”

Leah glared at her brother. “You!” she shouted suddenly not caring about her pain anymore. “You sent Emily over here! Didn’t you!?” She began to get up thinking about strangling her brother.

Seth looked thoroughly confused. _Emily was over?_ He thought, and then he wondered why she was blaming him for it. He stood up as he spoke.

“I had no idea Emily was here, I haven’t talked to her in like a week.” He said in a high octave trying to calm Leah down.

Leah just glared at him some more and then started to shake uncontrollably and got in his face. “Don’t play dumb with me! You sent Sam here first and then you sent Emily! Why are you trying to make my life miserable?!”

She was shaking so much from anger it looked like she was vibrating. Seth immediately recognized this as a symptom of phasing and did the only thing he could think of which was to drag her to the middle of the woods. He grabbed her by the waist and started to head towards the back door. Leah immediately started thrashing in Seth’s grip and was making it exceedingly difficult for him to get her outside. She was a lot stronger than he had anticipated and her body temperature didn’t seem cold to him which served as more evidence that she was about to phase.

“LET GO OF ME! WHERE ARE YOU TAKING ME SETH! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!” Leah just shouted fighting with all her might to break from Seth’s grasp, but he was a lot stronger than she was expecting.

Seth finally got her outside and just needed to make in the woods o no one would see her. He just made in the boarder of tree when she broke from his grasp. She turned to him and was about to lunge when that bone breaking feeling came back and she fell to the ground. Knowing what was coming next Seth moved away from her.

Leah screamed out as a blinding pain shot through her spine and she couldn’t breathe. Soon her screams turned howls and the pain slowly faded away. When Leah was finally able to breathe she realized she was on all fours and that paws were in place of where her hands used to be. Then things got even worse when she started to hear voices in her head.

_“Did someone just phase?”_

_“Who is it?”_

_“It sounds like a girl based on voice."_

_“Hold on we’re coming. Where are you?”_

Leah was too freaked out to answer; she just cowered down and started to whine. She felt like she was going crazy. Seth approached her cautiously with his hands in front of him.

“Leah?” That got her attention turned towards him and she looked at him curiously. “I know this all overwhelming, but I’m going to need you to stay calm til the others get here and can explain."

_“What others?”_ she tried to say, but it came out as a strangled whine and got even more frightened.

“I’m going to phase too so we can communicate.” Seth very slowly started to take off his pants and Leah immediately looked away. After a few moments Leah looked back and in place of her little brother was a sandy brown wolf. She was even more confused that she was before.

_“Leah we have a lot to explain.”_

She got startled even more at hearing her brothers voice in her head. She looked in to the eyes of the sandy brown wolf and in a small voice she said, _“Yeah, I think you have a lot to explain.”_


	6. Nothing's Changed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leah adjustment to life as a wolf doesn't go very smoothly

Sue came home after her day at the park with Daniel and found her front door wide open. Her first thought was not to panic because lately she's had houseguests who forget things as simple as closing the door, but when she came in her house was completely silent which was odd because she knew Leah was too sick to go anywhere and Seth's patrol shift should have been done by now. As she looked around she noticed her living room was in disarray. The chair she kept in the corner was knocked over, the magazines on the coffee table were beleaguered around the entire room, and the she noticed her kitchen had a few things from the island counter knocked to the floor. As she continued her trail of disorder, it lead her to the back door which was also left wide open. She checked outside and found no one with in the vicinity.

It was time to panic and she had no idea who to call. She could have called Chief Swan, but she didn't know if something supernatural had taken place and it was best not to attract attention to the reservation. Her next thought was to call the counsel, but then realized they would just call Sam and she really didn't feel like talking to him.

Needing some kind of order in her moment of chaos, Sue sat Daniel down in his carrier on the floor next to the couch and started to put things back where they belonged. When her house was in order she got Daniel out of his carrier and conceded that she had to call Sam and see if he knew what had happened to her home and where her daughter and son were.

Sue dialed the number and waited for Sam to pick up. After about five rings somebody finally picked up.

"Hello?" a feminine voice was at the other line and she knew it was Emily. Sue really didn't want to let her in on her business, but at the moment locating her children was more important than her dislike for her niece.

"Hey, Emily, it's Sue. Is Sam around?" She said in a very neutral tone.

"Umm, he left a little while ago, said it was important, but didn't say what. Is there something I could help you with instead?" Emily spoke in a very unsure voice through the receiver.

_You've helped enough_ , Sue thought but didn't voice it; instead she spoke in the most polite voice she could manage. "No sweetie, nothing you can help with, but if you see Leah or Seth could you call me back and tell me where they are?"

"Of course Sue. Are they alright?" Emily asked with concern lacing her voice. Sue just rolled her eyes, _this girl just doesn't know when to quit,_ she thought.

"No their perfectly fine, I was just concerned because they left without leaving a note. I thought maybe Sam at least knew where Seth was which might help me find Leah."

"Oh okay, I'll let Sam know when I see him to look out for them. Is there anything else you wanted?"

"Nope, that's all. Bye." Sue hung up the phone before Emily even had a chance to say bye back. She knew it was very rude, but she had bigger things to worry about than being polite to her niece.

With Daniel in one arm and the phone in the other Sue headed upstairs to her room. This was one of those times again when things were completely out of her control, but she just didn't know what that was. She had a gut feeling that it wasn't good and didn't know what to do about, so she just sat in her bed with her grandson and waited for whatever was coming to happen.

* * *

They had gotten Leah deeper in to the woods to reduce the probability of someone seeing them in wolf form. Currently Sam, Seth, Jacob and Embry were phased trying to get Leah to understand what was happening to her and hopefully would get her back to human form soon.

" _I don't believe a word you're saying. People can't turn into wolves it's physically impossible. You're all insane!"_ Leah said, much to everybody's annoyance. She had actual physical proof in front of her, not to mention that they were having this entire conversation in her head, but Leah was as stubborn as ever and currently denial was taking place along with her stubbornness. Seth decided to do the only thing he could think to do and show Leah his first phase.

_It was a normal Friday night at the Clearwater's, or as normal as it could get with one member missing. They were all in the living room watching some god awful game show. No one was really watching, they were just trying to pass the time. It had been nearly a year since Leah left and there was still a void in the house that couldn't be filled._

_For the past few days Seth had been sick with a fever and had been experiencing random pains throughout his body that would put him out of commission for an hour or so. Both Sue and Harry knew what was coming, they just didn't think it'd be like this or now._

_The phone rang from the kitchen and they were trying to let the machine get it but the moment that would happen they'd hang up and call again. Everybody was getting real annoyed with their persistent caller, especially Seth._

" _Seth, could you please get the phone from the kitchen?" Sue asked._

_Seth snapped his attention to his mother and in a menacing tone that not only shocked everybody in the room, but also scared them to their very core. "Why don't you get it Mother? I'm not a lap dog you can command."_

_Sue gasped at her sons tone. He had never spoken that way to anyone least of all her. It was Harry who decided to speak up; no one talked to his wife that way, not even his son. "Seth I think you owe your mother an apology for the way you just spoke to her. It was disrespectful."_

_Seth turned to his father breathing really heavy, eyes narrowed like his was trying to shoot lasers at him. "NO Dad, what's disrespectful is asking your kid to do something when you're fully capable of doing it yourself." He said, tone still unchanged._

_Harry noticed the out of character anger emanating from his son and instantly realized what was going to happen if he didn't calm down soon. "Seth, you need to calm down now before you hurt someone." He said curtly._

_Those were the wrong words because before he knew it, he was moving out of the way to avoid claw marks. Harry gasped in shock as a sandy brown wolf was in place of where his son was, then he felt a heavy pressure in his chest and he couldn't breathe. Before he knew everything went black and he never got a chance to explain to his son what was going on._

* * *

_Seth was perplexed about what had just happened he had just exploded at his parents for no apparent reason and then actually exploded. While he was trying to comprehend what was happening he started to hear voices in head that weren't his own._

" _Seth is that you buddy?" Jake asked_

" _I think it is." Embry said_

_Just as soon as he recognized the voices his attention was brought to his screaming mother and his unconscious father. He tried to say something ,but they just came out as strangled whines and then he tried to walk over and see if his dad was alright, but the living room had limited space for his giant frame to move and the places he could move were nowhere where he needed to be. He had stand and watch as his father drifted away from the living and his mother cried._

Seth took everybody out of the memory as he couldn't watch anymore without breaking down. Leah just stared at her brother and cried. She was finally brought out of her stubborn reverie and was forced to deal with how real the situation she was in. Dealing with the grief of her father had brought some sense back to her and she could no longer deny that werewolves weren't real and she wasn't one of them. This immediate shift in emotions made it easier for them to get inside Leah's guarded mind and try to explain everything.

In an authorative tone Sam spoke, " _Leah you're going to have to calm down if you ever want to get back to human again."_

At the sound of Sam's voice, Leah was snapped out of her grief and anger took its place. She turned towards Sam and started growling at him _. "Sam, don't you ever tell me what to do again."_ She started moving towards him slowly still growling like volatile wolf. _"What gives you the right? After everything you put me through! I should rip out your throat."_  She said that last statement in a low menacing tone that could strike fear in the bravest of men.

At Leah's words Sam immediately felt all the pain he put her through and his guilt came in full swing. He started thinking about everything he put her through from him phasing and it taking two weeks to get back to human form; to him meeting Emily and ultimately imprinting on her. He was thinking about the look on Leah's face the day he told her he couldn't be with her and all the tears that accompanied his words.

Leah was stuck reliving her pain from a year ago and couldn't take it, she couldn't take Sam's obvious pity and the other's that went along with it. So, in true Leah fashion she decided that she'd rather have everybody hate her than pity her.

" _You know that's a pretty touching story you have about your first phase Sam, but what I want to know is why is Embry's here because last time I checked, he wasn't a descendant of Taha Aki or any other spirit wolf."_

She knew she had struck cord because everybody's sorrowful demeanor quickly changed to one of uncomfortability. She kept going until all their attention was forced off her pain.

" _You know I wouldn't be surprised if ol' Joshua Uley had an affair with Embry's mom. Were your parents still married when he was born? Maybe it wasn't Joshua, maybe Mr. and Mrs. Black weren't the happy couple we all thought them to be. Ooo that would be quite a story. This might a fun game to play, whose daddy fucked Embry's mom? My money's on Josh, but you never know, these things can surprise you sometimes."_

It was clear everybody's minds were off pitying Leah and were right at the line being stepped over that no one had dare crossed in regards to Embry. She was about to dish out some more when Sam caught wind of that thought and shut her down quickly.

" _ENOUGH LEAH! We have a lot of other important things to explain and your patronizing us isn't going to get us anywhere."_ The Alpha command reigned in his voice and Leah couldn't help but comply. She wanted to lash out and attack him but she felt a weighed down every time she attempted to. She was starting to get very panicky at not being in control of her own actions and was getting frantic.

Jacob seeing that Sam's presence and authority was going to get them nowhere with Leah, he stepped up and decided it be best if he left. Sam heard this drifting thought and answered his unasked question.

" _I'm not going anywhere. I'm in charge and it's my responsibility."_ Sam spoke in a challenging tone to Jacob.

Jacob was having none of his bullshit, this wasn't about who was I charge it was about getting Leah to calm down.

" _This may be your responsibility, but you're not Leah's most favorite person in the world and you being here is just making everything worse."_

Sam knew he was right, but he still didn't like it. He felt like his authority was being challenged especially from the one person who had the power to take it. He looked to Leah who was still trying to lash out at him and he made his decision.

" _Tell me when she human again."_ And he ran off into the woods and exited everybody's mind.

Jacob walk slowly towards Leah and very softly spoke. _"It's alright Leah, he's gone."_

Leah just looked at Jacob's russet wolf and saw the sincerity in his eyes; she calmed down a bit but was still on the defensive.

" _What the hell was that? Why couldn't I do what I wanted?"_ Leah asked in a contrite tone that told everybody that the Leah they all know and love was back.

Still in a soft tone as to not poke the bear, so to speak, Jacob explained. _"It's an Alpha order. Sam's the Alpha of this pack and has a certain authority which you can't disobey over you and all of us."_

Leah looked perplexed by the thought of there being an Alpha of anything let alone Sam being one. _"I don't understand, if anybody would be alpha wouldn't it be you? You're father's the chief of the tribe."_

Jacob really didn't want to go into that whole explanation especially with how unimportant it was so he just gave her short answer that would explain it all. _"He phased first so he's the alpha."_

He gave her a bit of time to digest this before he spoke gain and started explaining other things to her. _"Now your phasing was triggered by anger so you're going to have to calm down pretty significantly if you want to walk on two legs again."_

Leah was still in deep thought about when Sam first phased, the time she thought he was missing, but instead was lost and alone. She couldn't fathom why he didn't tell her the truth then, they had no secrets at the time. _"Why didn't he tell me any of this? I wouldn't have judged him and he knew that. Why did he keep me in the dark so long?"_

" _He couldn't. The counsel wouldn't unless you were his imprint and then he imprinted on Emily making it moot point. It wasn't in his control, any of it. He just worked with what he was given."_ Jacob gave the best answer he could.

Leah thought about how both her and Sam were just working with what they were given, but if fate didn't want them together, why did it keep forcing them together through pain and strife. It could have let her be, go off to college without a baby and she could have lived a wonderful Sam-less life; but it didn't, fate gave her the wonderful gift of her son and now the curse of being a wolf. She wondered if any of the others had problems like this. _"Is Sam the only wolf to have imprinted?"_

" _No, Jared Cameron and Quil Atera are the other two to have imprinted."_ Jacob then elaborated by showing Leah what it was like for both Quil and Jared when the imprinted. Leah saw through Jacob how their worlds shifted and all there was was their imprint and nothing else. They were the center of their universe and she finally got how Sam could throw away their three year relationship. She saw how they would be anything that the imprint needed lover, friend, babysitter; you name it, they were it.

I didn't make her feel better to know all of this, she always thought that if she had answers the pain would at least lessen but it made it worse in some way. It made he realize how much was really out of her control and how there was no way she could have stopped it.

Jacob felt they were straying far from their task which was to get her human again and making her feel sad was not going to help in that matter. Quickly changing the subject he took his thoughts immediately away from imprinting.

" _So, Leah is there something that calms you down or makes you really happy because that would be a great place to start if we're ever going to get you back."_

Her thoughts immediately went to her son and how much she loved him; she would be devastated if anything ever took him away from her. Then she remembered the alpha command and how he could order her to give him her child. He could take her child away and she could do nothing about it because of this stupid curse.

Jacob tracking her thoughts carefully saw them stray towards panic. He was trying to stay away from her unspoken thoughts but she was getting too anxious. _"Leah calm down. No one's going to take your son away and I'm not sure Sam could even if he tried."_

That got Leah's attention. _"What do you mean he couldn't if he tried? I felt that earlier, I was powerless, I couldn't even move my toes."_

" _I mean though the Alpha order is unstoppable, it has its limitations. If it was truly that powerful he could have just ordered us all to phase back to human when we first phased and also when I first phased he tried to order me to stay away from Bella completely, but I was able disregard it and he had to cut his order down to me just not telling her I'm a werewolf which I eventually found a loophole to."_ He then showed Leah all his memories from that time and she realized that she wouldn't be powerless and if all else failed she could just have her mother take him away for a little while because he had no authority over her, in fact her mother being on the counsel probably meant she had authority over Sam.

With that fear locked away Leah was finally able to start to relax. Seth urged more thoughts about Daniel by revisiting the afternoon two days ago. Embry saw that they were getting her under control decided to go get her a blanket for when she phased back. Quickly getting out of sight to phase back and dressed he headed off toward the Clearwater's. When he got to the back door he tried to open it but it was locked. He realized that Sue must have come home and locked it. He banged on the door quite loudly and then heard the cries of baby Daniel.

* * *

Sue made it down to the backdoor as quickly as she could while trying to calm Daniel down. Finally some answers to what happened in her home and maybe even answers to the whereabouts of her children. She opened the door to a very anxious looking Embry, which was very odd because he was one of the calmest people, let alone wolf, that she knew.

"What happened? Is someone hurt? Did something awful happen?" Sue was frantic; she needed to know what would have Embry so worked up.

Embry grabbed Sue by the shoulders and held her there. He needed to be very clear and hoped she would let him leave fast because he was kind of on a time table. "Leah phased into a wolf this afternoon, I'm just here to get a blanket to cover her when she phases back. He let go of her quickly and headed for the living room to grab he blanket that was hung over the couch. He would have been more considerate in any other situation, but this, he had to get back in time before she exploded again when she realized she was completely naked in the woods.

Sue just stood frozen at the doorway while she tried to digest the information Embry had just given her. She thought after Seth this wouldn't be something she'd have to worry about again. The curse had taken another family member of hers and she couldn't do anything about it. She looked down at Daniel and thought about how he would more than likely have to face this curse when he was of age. There was no doubt about it with two wolves as parent running through his blood; the gene would be the strongest in him.

Clearing her mind of things she couldn't control, Sue turned to things she could; starting with calling the counsel and notifying them of a new wolf.

* * *

Embry made it back into the woods just in time because Leah had just made it back to human form and was just about to freak out at her lack of clothes when Embry threw a blanket at her. She covered herself immediately and was really thankful someone had thought of that.

Jacob and Seth came back human and dresses and approached Leah. There were other things they needed to explain now that she was on two feet again.

"So you may notice few changes to your body such as our height and temperature. You're stronger than the average human being and have heightened senses. You also have accelerated healing. Now your emotions might be a little unpredictable right now and with that your phasing will also be unpredictable so you're going to have to stay away from people until you're in control and not as dangerous." Jacob explained and waited for her to completely comprehend what he was saying.

She just stared at him as she was slowly seeing what he was getting at. "Are you saying-" she couldn't finish her sentence it was too horrible.

Jacob looked at her with sympathetic eyes as he knew this was the worst thing he could say, but he had to. "Yes Leah, that means you're going to have to stay away from Daniel until you have control over your wolf"

Leah was upset, "this is so unfair, how do you expect me to-" She didn't get to finish her sentence before she burst into a furry grey wolf and she realized what they were talking about. She was able to phase back without their help which was a start. She grabbed the blanket again to cover herself up again and looked over at the three men who were making her life a living hell at the moment.

"Emily's face, that wasn't a bear and if you're not careful that could be your son but worse because he wouldn't make it." Jacob told her earnestly.

Leah just nodded with understanding; she was going to have to protect her son from herself too. "How do I get control? Is there a way I can practice?"

"Umm, you can start by figuring out what emotions trigger you phase such as anger or grief and then replicate them til you don't phase. You've already found a way phase back so it should be a bit easier in that sense."

Leah just nodded at Jacob and started practicing. She was going to see her son again soon if it was the last thing she did.

* * *

Jacob had left Leah alone in the woods to practice getting control and went to notify Sam that they got her human. Embry told them both that he told Sue that Leah had phased and they were currently in her living room explaining everything that was going on.

"So you're okay with taking care of Daniel for a while?" Jacob asked he didn't want to assume things; she might think a baby was Leah's sole responsibility.

"Of course he's my grandson and he needs me right now and I'm not about to abandon him." Sue retorted in a harsh tone, what kind of person did he think she was?

Sam thought about Daniel being with Sue until Leah was stable and realized he could take him, but he needed to run it by Leah first. He hoped her understanding imprinting and how out of his control it was would give leeway for him to finally see his son.

He approached Leah, who looked to be in deep concentration. He stood and waited for her pull her attention towards him.

* * *

She heard him before he even got close, she just hoped he'd stay away. That smell she'd know anywhere, wolf or not and now it was especially pungent. Conceding that he wasn't going to leave she turned toward him and huffed in annoyance. "What?" she said in a short tone to tell him she did not have time for this. Although, she was happy that she was still human with him near.

Sam cleared his throat as he thought about how he was going to start this conversation. "Umm..I was wondering….you know now that you understand maybe you'd let me see him?" he was very nervous about her response, in the past she'd ripped his face off and now she could literately do just that.

Anger was not her response but a deep sadness resonated with her as she realized she was going to crush him again. She took in a deep and spoke. "Sam, I may understand why you left me, but it's given me more of a reason to keep him away from you."

Sam started to protest but she moved her hand to stop him from talking. "Let me finish and maybe you'll understand where I'm coming from." He nodded and let her proceed.

"I may not have been a mother for very long, nor do I know all there is to parenting, but I do know; the one instruction that actually comes with children is that they are supposed to come first above _everything._ And with the imprint, Daniel will never be your first priority, Emily will and I don't want to put him through that kind of rejection, rejection you've felt with your own father. Did it feel great to grow up knowing that between you and a bottle of jack that your dad would choose the booze? No. I felt shitty and you spent a whole lot of time wondering what you did wrong, which was nothing. He was just not meant to be a father and you would have been a hell of a lot better off if he wasn't in your life ever to begin with because he couldn't be the man you needed. You may be the father Daniel has but you aren't the father he needs and until you can be that father you need to stay away from him. Do what your father couldn't. I'm sorry but it has to be this way."

Never in his life had he resent the imprint more than this moment, it had officially turned him into his father, which he had spent an entire lifetime trying to avoid. He left Leah alone and went to the cliffs to sulk; this was one time in which Emily couldn't help.

* * *

It had been well into the night and Leah was still practicing. She had gotten better at controlling her anger responses but then some spontaneous thought about Emily would set her off again and she'd be a ball of fur. Jacob came to find her; he knew she had to be exhausted and starving at this point.

"Leah, you need to rest and eat, practicing in this state isn't going to do you any good."

Leah just huffed at Jacob; didn't he understand what was at stake here? "I can't stop until I'm under control, I need to see him again."

Jacob rolled his eyes; man this woman could be stubborn to the point of stupidity. "True, but you can't see him again if you die of starvation and exhaustion." He pointed out.

Leah challenged him. "I thought you said we could heal rapidly, wouldn't I just heal before I die?"

"Not if you don't have the energy to heal. It's a give and take system Leah. Everything basically works the same, it's just enhanced." Jacob retorted. He knew he had her too.

Leah rolled her eyes and threw he hands in the air. "Fine, I'll eat but that's it. I will not rest until I can see my son again." She drew her finger to his face to make her point.

"Fine come on, Emily should have food set out." He was motioning for her to follow her but she just stood her ground.

"Leah come on, she's not even awake so you won't even have to see her. You need to eat and she's the only person who has enough food to fill you, so come on damn it." Her stubbornness was wearing thin on him. He had no idea how he got stuck with Leah duty. He guessed it was better him than Sam.

Leah weighed her options. She could either eat the food of the evil bitch or starve to death and never see her son again. Damn it, evil bitch was her only option at the moment and she was starving, she hadn't eaten since yesterday morning. It was already nearing 2 A.M and her stomach was protesting at the lack of food. Dragging her feet she followed Jacob to Sam and Emily's house, which should have been hers and Sam's but she didn't have time to dwell on that now.

Jacob left Leah alone to eat and went back to his patrol. She just kept eating the food set out not caring what it was. She had no idea that she could consume so much and was a little worried she might get fat, but her hunger quickly made that notion one she didn't care much about .

* * *

Emily came down the stairs quietly as she saw Leah devour more food than she could even if she didn't have a figure to look after. She wanted to talk to her, this would be the first time they could have this conversation where everybody had all the information. Emily sat in the chair across from Leah. "I wanted to talk to you Leah. I never wanted to betray you, it took away my choice not to. It wasn't my fault."

At that last statement Leah was starting to get really pissed. This was the woman, who was making controlling her wolf especially difficult, was now here trying to gain her forgiveness. She had had it!

"You know who didn't have a choice? Sam, me, my son, imprinting took them all away and gave them to you. Sam's supposed to be what you needed and apparently you needed my fiancé of three years to leave me. So, what was that again about it not being you fault because from where I'm standing, you're the only one to blame." Leah stood up and stepped away from the chair and pushed it in. "Now, I'm going to go back out there and find a way to control this thing in me unless you want a repeat of what happened to your face on the other side." She said snidely. Emily just shook her head and let her leave.

_Things are going to be tense around here,_ Emily thought and then went back to her empty bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm an idiot and just found out how to export my story from ffn to here without having to tediously go through it to make sure the match. Anyway that being said the chapters should be up here a lot faster.


	7. That Fine Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leah get's to see her son for the first time since phasing.

It was a strangely warm and sunny day in La Push which was a nice break from the gloomy clouds that generally overtook the reservation. It seemed the weather had decided to mirror the ambiance for the day because today, after two weeks of non-stop practicing control, Leah could finally hold her son.

Even though she definitely had authority over her anger, Leah wasn't in the clear completely to get back to her duties as a mother, so here they were today, out in an open space in the middle of the woods, Sue holding Daniel on one side, Jacob, Seth and Leah on the other. Leah, with a lustrous smile on her face, took cautious steps toward her son. She was one hundred percent sure she wouldn't do anything to hurt her son based off the mother child bond alone, but Sam had been just as sure he wouldn't hurt his imprint, so she took that story with a grain of salt and was very careful with the most important thing in her life.

For these past two weeks Leah had been forced to watch her son from afar; Sue had been taking Daniel to an open space just like they were and stand a safe distance so Leah could at least have some moments with her son while she was too dangerous to get any closer. Not only did she have to endure this but she also had to listen to her sons cries every night from right outside her window. Her heart broke every night, but at least it was better than absolutely no contact at all.

Leah made it to her mother and before any words could be said she gently grabbed her son from her mother's arms. With her new added strength, she had to relearn how to handle things gentler like a toddler being taught how to handle a hamster. The fear of breaking her son now was tens times greater than when he was first born and the nurse handed him to her.

With her son safely secured in the crook of her arm, she took note of the changes in her son since she last got to do this. He was obviously getting longer, but he looked like he was getting a bit chubbier. She didn't know if it was because he was growing or because he had been switched to baby formula. She suppose her mother was lucky that she hadn't had to have been the one to cut Daniel off cold turkey from breast milk because before, when she thought she was getting sick, she had been using the formula to prevent him from catching what she had, and boy did he not take that change well. Daniel from the time he was born had always been really vocal about things he disliked and the fit he threw when switch to formula was the most ear-splitting one she had experienced to date, which includes the one he had when he was shoved out of her body though a canal that was smaller than he would have liked.

Daniel looked up at his mother and automatically smiled and brought his little hands up to touch her face. Leah was joyous at his recognition; the worst part of this separation from her son was the fear that his tiny baby mind would forget his own mother and that fear had just now been sedated. She drew him in closer to her face and kissed his forehead, then both of his cheeks, his little nose, his tiny fists, his tummy; she kissed every part of him she could reach. She took in his smell which she had only been faintly been able to do with him at a distance, but now he was close up and she could commit the smell to memory again.

As she held her son close to her she thought no woman should ever have to be separated from the their child like this, but of course circumstance had always been out of her favor and she had to learn to adapt. If life's cruelty had taught her anything it's that she always perseveres and though things may suck right now, there's an actual chance that things will get better, provided that she survives this impending war.

Leah looked up from her son to the people standing around waiting for her to slip up. She was now definitely sure that as long as her son was in her arms she wouldn't hurt anybody, including Emily, so her son was as safe as ever if not more now that she can protect him against all threats. She smiled at her mom and nodded her head and then turned to the most anxious of the bunch to reassure him.

"Jacob, it's fine, I'm not going to hurt him." Though she was quite annoyed with his lack of faith in her, she still spoke with a smile on her face and tried to convey with her eyes how confident she was that everybody was safe.

Jacob took in Leah's body language and saw she was nowhere near any kind of outburst and just nodded in response. They all took off out of the woods towards the Clearwater home, so Leah could spend real quality time with her son uninterrupted. Once they made to the house Sue and Seth went to the car and drove off to the Blacks and left Leah and Jacob. Jacob stayed outside incase anything was to go wrong. Leah just went into the house too enraptured in her son to even care where everyone else was.

Leah went upstairs to her room and sat in the rocking chair they had put in the corner and sat Daniel in her lap to rememorize every detail of her little man. It had been way too long since she'd been able to just look at her son, see him smile, watch him wiggle his arms and legs. She kind of hoped he'd have one of his temper tantrums so she could be his mother again and soothe him. After about an hour, she got her wish. Daniel's hunger broke the peaceful atmosphere that the room had had since she sat down and she now had to be mom again and feed him. She first got his pacifier and placed it in his mouth to sate his cries until she could make him a bottle.

One of the things that really sucked being a wolf was that she couldn't produce breast milk anymore; she couldn't nourish her child anymore and it especially sucked knowing that the one thing he needed her for she could no longer provide. It broke her heart having to make the formula knowing she couldn't just put him back on her milk. The worst part of this whole mess was no one could tell her why she couldn't do her motherly duty. There had never been a female wolf before her, so everything was trial and error. And it's not like she could bring it up with the guys, they were more squeamish talking about her breast milk than they were with talking about their parent's sex lives. The only ones who had slightly understood were Jacob and Embry, but all they gave her was sympathy with no answers, so she was basically screwed.

Once the bottle was ready she replaced the pacifier with it and her immediately started suckling as though it'd be his last meal. It surprised her that something as simple as watching her son eat could bring her out of any mood. He truly was a miracle because before him she'd have been in a pissy depressed mood well until the end of time. Once he finished eating, he promptly went to sleep and gave Leah another thing to observe, his breathing.

Leah watched her son sleep for four whole hours, a record for a nap with him, and was entranced with every one of them. She wondered how imprinting even compared to the bond she had with her child because if it was truly the strongest how could Sam have hurt Emily. Just one moment with Daniel and she couldn't imagine ever being infuriated enough to phase. According to the stories she heard as a kid, imprints were supposed to be their other half and sate the wolf, meaning Sam's mistake should have never happened. Also his actions proved, in her eyes, that there were bonds stronger than an imprint because the bond she feels as mother and child feels ten times greater than anything she's ever picked up from Sam or any of the other imprinted wolves. There's also the issue of Jacob's bond with Bella, the others try to diminish it because he didn't imprint, but from what she felt inside his mind, it was just as strong, if not stronger, than that of an imprint. In Leah's eyes, his love for her was more valid because he chose her; Bella may be an idiot and not have chosen him, but Leah can't fault her for choosing what she wants; though she can fault her for many other things such as endangering her life and the lives of others only to turn around and selfishly end her life and make her sacrifices worthless. Leah wondered if Bella truly saw the repercussions of the decision she's about to make; highly doubted it, she always seemed a little too single minded to think everything through.

Leah's thoughts were interrupted by her mother trying to quietly enter the room. With Leah's new enhanced hearing that task was impossible. Sue looked down at her daughter who was sitting on the floor with her head leaned against the crib near her son's head, and gave her a sad smile. Leah knew what that smile meant, it was time to leave. She felt the tears automatically blur her vision and her throat close up. She had to leave her son, once again, except this time it had to be on purpose. She understood their reasoning for only letting her visit until they were completely sure she was under control, but they didn't understand how much pain it caused emotionally and physically to do it. For some reason they couldn't understand how impossible it was for her to hurt her own child, but Sam's incident with Emily seem to be the ruling example of the dangers of being around a wolf and she was now ordered by the elders to stay away. Her mother even ruled for this and it beyond pissed her off; she thought her of all people would understand, but she didn't. She had opted for a complete lack of faith in her daughter.

Leah got up off the floor and bent down to gently kiss her son and then left the room without a word. When she encountered Jacob outside her backyard she was sobbing silently with unwiped tear streaks running down her face. She wanted to give into her wolf and phase, but that wasn't a safe place for her especially when she's this vulnerable. She just walked past Jacob and then headed for the cliffs. They always had a calming effect on her; no matter what her problems were she could go to the cliffs and watch the chaos of the currents. They reminded her that no matter how rough life got, it could always get worse so count your blessings where they came and today had most indefinitely been a blessing.

When she made it to the cliffs she sat on her rock and let the current do its job. It wasn't particularly chaotic today with the weather, but it was still vast and endless and could be easily stirred. She never quite understood why she identified with the current the way she did, the things she saw in it weren't the same as everybody else's. Most people saw the vastness of the ocean and thought of opportunity, but she saw all the things that could be jumbled in to a mess that was now her life. Of all the places she imagined herself, shapeshifting werewolf who is also a single mother who has to share a mind with her ex was never on her radar and coping with this has been the toughest thing she's ever had to do, which includes dealing Sam breaking her heart.

She heard footsteps approaching from five miles away and already knew who it was, Jacob. He was annoying as hell but she was thankful for him. Instead of having to deal with Sam every waking moment, Jacob had stepped up and "volunteered" to deal with her. If any news or orders needed to be conveyed to her, Jacob was the one who gave it. They realized she'd be more compliant and Sam would have to use the alpha order less if they did it this way. She kind of wished Jacob would step up as alpha and she wouldn't have to deal with Sam's orders at all, but she knew that was real wishful thinking. Jacob was dead set on not having the job, and plus, even if he did, she'd still have to hear Sam's thoughts, especially those involving her backstabbing cousin.

Jacob had finally made it to her and sat down on the ground near the rock she was sitting on. He took a deep breath and then spoke. "I'm sorry"

Leah gave a humorless snort in response. She knew he was being sincere, but it didn't help her any. He had just given her the empty response that's used to cover up the words he meant, I pity you.

"Black, I don't take pity well, so I suggest this be the last time you utter those words to me."

Jacob just nods in response thankful that was the end of it and she didn't lash out at him. They're both silent staring out at the endless abyss wishing they could just throw their troubles into it and have that be the end of it. But they were both realistic enough to know solving their problems is going to take a lot of heartache and pain before they're even close to being solved. They sit there for a long time in a sort of camaraderie that stems from the pain and rejection only they know.

It's completely dark out when Jacob decides to end the silence. "Come on Leah, Sam wants the pack to have a meeting together before we meet with the Cullen's in the clearing."

Leah groans in response, she hates the idea of teaming up with the cause of her current problems, but when battling an army of vampires, it takes one to know one, and she'd like to win this battle, so that her becoming this awful creature has at least some purpose. Jacob and Leah get up and head towards Sam's, or as Leah knows it, Hell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kind of a disclaimer but mostly a way to avoid giving any false hope. This is not going have Blackwater at any point, I have no problem with the pairing in general, I just would love Leah to be someone's first choice and with Jacob that's never going to happen.


	8. What Was Once Mine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leah refuses to go into the Uley residene

Leah and Jacob had just reached the Uley residence when Leah suddenly stopped and Jacob just continued on. Jacob made it to the door before he noticed Leah wasn't with him. When he turned he saw a very ticked off Leah with her arms crossed in front of her glaring at the house. Jacob let out a frustrated sigh. He had no idea why he thought she'd just go in; she hadn't been inside the house since her first phase. They'd been bringing food to her, which was a miracle in itself that food lasted long enough from Emily's to the middle of the woods.

Reluctantly, Jacob walked down the steps and approached Leah. She just looked at the house with a growing resentment for what was supposed to be hers.

"Leah, come on. We're already late." Jacob said voice filled with frustration. It had been a long day and was going to be an even longer night and he didn't need this.

Leah's glare moved from the house to Jacob. "No one said I had to go in with you. So, if you're so concerned with punctuality, go on without me."

Jacob rolled his eyes. "It's a pack meeting. Everybody's supposed to be there, including you, so get a move on it."

Leah just huffed and then decided to challenge him. "I am here. I can hear everything perfectly fine from here and you guys can just as easily hear me. So, again, _go on without me_."

Jacob knew logic was correct, but still didn't feel like dealing with the look he was going to get from Sam for not getting her inside. Taking in deep breaths, Jacob reigned in his anger and calmly spoke to Leah.

"I'm well aware what this house is and what it represents, but right now we have more important things to focus. _You_ have more important things to focus on. And the more drag your feet with these little things, the longer everything else is going to drag on. There's an army of newborn leaches headed this way ready to threaten everyone we love, so suck it up and save it for bigger things that you can actually change."

As sincere as Jacob sounded, it didn't make her feel any better. She stood her ground and stayed right in her spot defiantly.

"The meeting will go just fine, if not better, with me standing right here. I can hear them and they can hear me, so there's no problem. In other words, pull you lips from Sam's ass and leave me alone."

He had no idea why he expected her to reasonable, granted in the past couple of weeks she'd been nicer and a lot more cooperative with him, but you can't change a leopard's spots. Her logic was correct and he really didn't feel like dealing with a temper tantrum from Leah especially when it wasn't his job. Sam could deal with this, he resolved.

"Fine, stay here like an ornery child. It's not my job and I certainly didn't sign up for dealing with this." And with that he left her standing outside the Uley's home to seethe in her own pain and anger.

Today had started off so great only to be ruined by her wolf gene. She thought the day she phased would be the day she most resented being a wolf, but it was today, when her most precious was literately taken away from her again without promise to get it back anytime soon. And now, she was being asked to walk into the home that Sam bought for her and him to live out their lives together. She'd been in it before, but now both Sam and Emily would be inside to rub salt on her wounds even more. She was well aware that her difficult behavior was not only unnecessary but unneeded at this time, but she figure with what she'd been through the past year; she deserved to be as petty as she wanted to be.

Leah shook her head from those thoughts and decided to focus on the meeting. It felt completely unnecessary to have this meeting, it was pretty straightforward. They meet the Cullen's in the clearing and get insight on what was coming their way. If any of the Cullen's tried anything the treaty would be broken and they'd be missing a few members of their precious little made up family. But everyone knew control freak Sam needed order everybody around before anything had even happened.

"Okay, everybody's here, _respectively_. I just wanted to go over with everybody what's happening later tonight. We're going to the clearing as neutral ground. That means no baiting, biting or anything unless they strike first. I'm not saying we should trust them, but they have pertinent information and their help would really increase our odds at survival." Leah could hear everybody's nods as Sam reiterated crap he'd been saying since this whole alliance took place. She again thought how pointless his words were because everybody already knew it and if he really wanted to speed things along, he could get them all to phase and he could go over his whole spiel in his head for about five seconds.

"Now all of us are only going to this first meeting to get their scent and to get a sense of security, but after that only a Jacob and I will be going and we'll share what we learned after at a more reasonable hour." They all perked up at that, even Leah was on board with that idea. It meant less time in the leaches presence.

"Now I know this isn't ideal and we would rather take care of this issue ourselves, but it would be bode well for us to accept their help and we want everybody coming back from this alive." The timber in Sam's voice leaked authority and it irked Leah's nerves like no other. She could take getting order from Jacob despite him being younger than her, but Sam, he broke her without a second thought and now has the audacity to bark orders at her. The thing that was even worse was that she didn't want to be this bitter, broken person that everybody either pitied or hated. She wanted to be Leah, the girl who took crap from no one and was either adored or envied. She knew she was still those things, but her pain outshined all the qualities that used to be her.

Sam continued to drone on, but Leah wasn't listening. She just continued to stare at the house that was supposed to be her own. She even helped Sam pick it out when they still had a future together. She felt it was a little early to be picking out houses especially with her plans to go away to college, but love was blinding that way, it overtook logic in many ways. The funny thing is had they stayed together, it would have been the best decision they made together. But now it was the house he lived in with _her_ and would be making a life with _her_ and now she was being forced to watch.

She was fuming and was very close to phasing in their front yard, in plain sight of anybody near. She had a malicious though about Emily inquiring whether she liked her hand-me-downs. There wasn't an original thing about the things Emily had. She had her house, her fiancé, even her role in the pack and yet she seemed blindly happy about losing everything that was hers and stepping into someone else's life.

Sam had finally stopped talking and the rest of the pack was filing out of the house. As they were filing out Leah was receiving a cacophony of glares from each of them for staying outside. She didn't know what they were so mad about; they generally preferred not being in her presence. Sam was the last to exit the house and they all stated heading for the woods. Once they were out of plain sight they all started stripping down and attaching their clothes to their ankles. Leah found a secluded place away from the others and did the same. Once she had finished that task she let out all of the anger she had been suppressing earlier and phased.

Once phased, she was automatically hit with mindless chatter she didn't really feel like listening to, she quickly tuned them out. She cleared her mind as best as she could, but with the direction of her thoughts earlier that was difficult. She was thinking about the only neutral thing she could think about without giving Sam glimpses of Daniel or bumming everybody out, her mom. She thought about how she had always been there for even when she was stubborn past the pint of logic. Her thought were interrupted by Sam.

" _ **Alright everybody let's head out.**_ _"_

Everybody quickly got into formation with Sam in the front and Leah in the back next Colin, one of the baby wolves, and then they were off. They made it to the clearing in about five minutes. Had Leah been able to go on her own, she could have made it there in two. Her annoyance at the slow pace quickly subsided when she realized she'd be early to a leech party had she gone ahead of everybody.

The entire Cullen clan, including Bella, was waiting in the clearing. Everybody was mindful to stay as quiet as possible knowing the gift of the leech Bella was obsessed with. Leah honestly didn't care if he heard anything she had to say because she knew he'd be dead the moment he decided to use anything against her. Sam stepped forward in front of the patriarch of the clan. Edward immediately left Bella to go to Carlisle's side to translate. Leah observed how Bella seemed to be slightly pained by him leaving her side and could only think of one word, _pathetic._

The pack didn't seem to notice her comment but Edward did because the moment the thought formed in her mind she was automatically met with a glare from him. Leah just glared back in defiance, no one intimidate her least of all a mind raping leech. She was slightly surprised that Jacob didn't say something when that thought slipped, but she guesses that was because he knew she was right.

Sam started speaking, taking Edwards attention away from Leah back to the reason he was there to begin with.

" _ **We are going to stay in our wolf form until we get a little more comfortable with this arrangement. We're all only going to be here for this meeting then only Jacob and I will be attending and then sharing through the pack mind later.**_ _"_

Edward immediately started translating Sam's words through some unwanted paraphrasing. Once all the pleasantries were through the training began. For this one they all just sat back while the watched Jasper release his knowledge about new born vampires. Leah was actually a little amazed at what she observed. She'd only seen vampires through other pack member's minds and they didn't really spend much time observing them before they torched them.

When everything was finished and they had all cataloged each leeches stench, Leah's mind wandered to the whole reason this meeting was necessary, Bella. Obviously her companions and her behavior toward Jacob had Bella on Leah's do not like list of people, but she also pitied her. This girl had become prey an abusive relationship, granted it wasn't intentional by both parties but it was there. Edward was your classic possessive boyfriend and Bella was the codependent girl that easily attracted these kinds of people, but Bella was so codependent that she failed to create an identity outside her boyfriend. She only had one friend outside of her boyfriend and his friends and that was only because Jacob was annoyingly persistent. Leah wondered how someone could demean themselves like that because even when she was blindly in love with Sam, she would have never let him take over her identity like that. It was the only reason she survived him breaking-up with her, she was her own person. The thing that broke her was the betrayal. Had Sam just simply broken up with her, she would have been able to get over it and move on and probably would be civil especially in regards to Daniel. But he didn't, instead he carried on an affair with her cousin and only broke up with her when he got caught. Destiny doesn't excuse violating simple principles of trustworthyness and everybody needed to realize that if they were going to ever get anywhere with her.

The pack headed off their separate ways to their homes, or in Leah's case the Black's, to get some rest. The pixie leech said no vampires had decided to head in their direction anytime soon so they all were getting a three hour reprieve from patrols until next shift, which happened to be Leah's.

Leah found a secluded place and quickly got herself on two legs and dressed in record time. She made her way into the Black house and flopped down onto the couch. She could hear Jacob in his room and Billy was still asleep, so she could get at least a little bit of uninterrupted sleep. It was a little ironic that being child free had not increased the amount of sleep she could get. Leah rolled over to her sided and sighed. She never thought she'd miss being woken up at odd hours by a three month old, but now that she didn't have the option, she wouldn't wish for anything more. Ending that train of thought, Leah closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep.


	9. Sunshine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leah get control of her life back again.

Leah sat in her rocking chair with Daniel in her arms lulling him to sleep. It had been a week since she last was able to hold him and it was taking its toll on her wellbeing. It was bad enough being stuck in the minds of people that didn't want her there, but due to Jacob being her main patrol buddy she had been stuck on Bella vision all the damn time. She didn't even have time for her own unrequited love, let alone Jacob's. She wasn't even sure what he was so hung up on, the girl was codependent to a fault, which meant that there wasn't really much of her to love especially with her heavily attached to someone else.

Leah pushed those thoughts from her mind and focused completely on her son. She didn't know when the next time she'd get to see him. He stared up at her with heavy eyes and smiled his toothless smile that always warmed her heart. She couldn't help but smile back. As she stared down an old song from her childhood was brought to her mind and it wasn't until this moment that she finally understood it. In a low whispered voice she began to sing while she traced over Daniel's features.

" _You are my sunshine_

" _My only sunshine_

" _You make me happy_

" _When shies are grey_

" _You'll never know dear_

" _How much I love you_

" _Please don't take my sunshine away"_

Leah was in tears by the end of the song as she realized her sunshine was going to be taken away by the end of the day and it was all her fault. Daniel noticed the shift in Leah's emotion and started to whimper and move in her arms. Leah reigned in her emotions and rocked Daniel back into his sleepy state until he finally drifted off to sleep.

Leah got up and put Daniel in his crib and quietly left his room. Normally she would watch him sleep, but it was really hitting how much is being taken from her just because nobody had faith in her. She was really never one for caring what others thought of her, but now she literately depended on it and that thought infuriated her. Leah Clearwater depended on NO ONE and a bunch of elders who had no place interfering in her life were definitely low on her list of people to depend on.

It was decided then and there that she was going to take her son back. This was not going to be the last time she was going to hold her son until they decided. It was now her decision and no one could refute it.

* * *

Sue came home five hours later to retrieve her grandson. She really didn't like doing this to her daughter but it was necessary to keep him safe. She knew her daughter had quite a temper and controlling that was going to take quite a lot of time especially now that the wolf gene was activated. She knew this was painful for her daughter, but it would be even more painful for her if her son died at her hands. She was protecting Leah the best way she could, no matter how unpleasant it was.

She made her was to Leah's room ready to see tears in her daughters eye, but was meet with a wonderful light inducing smile. She couldn't comprehend what had put it there; Leah had to know what was coming next. Sue looked at her daughter with sad eyes and motioned to take her grandson from her when Leah moved so fast to the other side of the room preventing her from doing what she came to do.

With an exasperated sigh Sue spoke. "Come on Leah. Don't make this any harder than it needs to be."

Leah looked over at her mother with resentment lacing her thoughts. Of all people, she expected her mother to at least have faith in her, but she seemed to have the none at all. She knew if her father was still here he'd have faith in her.

"Why don't you believe in me?" The words came out so weak and feeble that she couldn't believe they came out her mouth. She was Leah Clearwater, weak was never a word used to describe her, but lately she felt anything but. Though her strength and speed had increased with her transformation, she had never felt so feeble in her life.

"Why are you so dead set on believing I'll hurt my son?" This time she spoke with a little more poise. The days of her being a push-over were now completely gone, so she'd better sound like it.

Sue looked in her daughter's eyes seeing the hurt and betrayal. She hadn't meant to come off as someone who'd expected the worst of her child, but the consequences of not could be more irreparable than if she did. "I don't believe you'd hurt your son intentionally, but-"

"But what Mom? It's out of my hands whether or not I hurt him! I'm completely out of control! Well guess what? I am in control and it's completely in my hands! I don't need some counsel to decide something that I know to be true. My son is completely safe with me no matter what."

Daniel decide to show off his set of lungs the moment Leah stared to shout, but Leah need to make a point, so his cries were going to go uncontrolled for a bit. Rocking her son as soothingly as she could, given the situation, she waited for her mother's response.

"Leah you don't understand. Everything that happened with Sam? Emily's his imprint! If something as sacred as that couldn't even stop him from hurting the person he loved most in the world what chance do you have."

Leah felt a sting in her heart the moment she mentioned the imprint, but this wasn't about that. She needed to get her mother to understand that Sam doesn't define her anymore, then maybe she could see her side.

"I'm not Sam mother. I don't have anger repression issues. I know to express it in a healthy way. And besides, how dare you compare the love I have for my son to that of Sam and Emily! What they have will never even be close to real love." If Sam hadn't ruined her life before his mistakes were definitely now. For the second time in her life Sam had defined how people saw and judged her and that was even more infuriating than depending on the elders.

"Leah you have to let this go. We're only doing what's best for both you and Daniel sweetie. How much more painful would it be for you if you lost control. How much worse would it be for you? No one's out to get you Leah. We only want the best."

Daniel's cries had died down to whimpers. Not wanting to startle him anymore, Leah reigned in her anger and spoke at a normal volume.

"Mom, I'm well aware what can happen and I'm well aware how much more devastating killing my son would be than this. So do really think I'd risk all that to just get out pain. Do really think that I'm that selfish of a person. Mom, I am 100 percent sure that I am not a danger to my son. I am 100 percent sure that he is safest with me. I just wish everybody else could see what I see, feel what I feel, but I'm done. I am done with waiting for everyone to understand. I'm his mother and I know what's best for him. I'm not giving him up again, you can't make me."

Sue looked at her daughter with a critical eye and knew she was completely serious. As much a Sue would love to have complete faith in her daughter, she couldn't risk it. So she was going to do the one thing that would make her daughter hate her more than anybody in the world. She hoped she forgave her some day.

"Well it seems like there's nothing else I can do." And with that she left.

* * *

Leah was sitting the rocking chair from her childhood cooing at her son again. She had made some progress today in getting him back. She knew her fight was not over, but at least she made headway with her mother. She was in the middle of humming "You Are My Sunshine" When Sam burst in her bedroom.

Leah immediately pulled Daniel closer to her body as to protect him as he started to cry. She then looked at Sam and began glaring profusely at him.

"What the hell are you doing here!"

Sam just gave an exasperated sigh knowing once again he was going to be the bad guy, but whether she liked or not he cared about his son and the longer he spent in her presence the longer he was in danger.

"Leah, you need to put Daniel in his crib and leave." Sam's voice held a dominant timber, but he was not using an alpha order.

Leah challenged him with her eyes. No matter what she was not going to be intimidated, alpha or not. "I'm not leaving my son. I don't care what you do to me, the only way I'm leaving is if you physically make me."

Sam looked deep into Leah's and was immediately saddened. He hating doing this especially with Leah, but it needed to be done. " **Leah. Put Daniel in his crib and leave. Don't come back until the elders permit it.** "

His voice vibrated across the entire room leaving even Daniel quiet. Leah felt the command deep in her bones and almost gave into it immediately. It felt nearly physically impossible but she held on to Daniel and strained to keep herself in the chair. She shook her and looked up at Sam and said, "No" in a strained voice.

Sam was perplexed, she should have followed his order by now, but Leah was known for being stubborn so he repeated the command.

" **Leah. Put Daniel in his crib and leave. Don't come back until the elders permit it.** " He said it slower this time just so she understood every command he was saying.

His reinforcement of the command made it harder, but she held strong. With thoughts of what she was fighting for, she started to relax her body. Sam would not control her today, tomorrow, or ever. She was Leah Clearwater, the first female werewolf, the mother of the alpha's first child, and the most stubborn woman alive, Sam Uley has no power over her.

"I. Said. No." She looked up at him through slitted eyes to let him know just who was in charge of this situation.

This was something he had never encountered before and he had no idea how to rectify it, so he did the next best thing he could think. He quickly walked over to the rocking chair and bent down and grabbed Daniel as best as he could with him tightly in Leah's arms. Daniel's quietness quickly evaporated the minute his father started tugging at him. Sam figured with his size and being alpha that he would easily be able to overpower her physically, but once again he had underestimated her willpower and stubbornness. He especially underestimated the lengths a woman would go for her child.

Leah quickly disengaged Sam from her son using her legs to kick him away from her and her free arm to remove his hands from him. She stood up and made her way to the door. As she was exiting she turned her head to look at a very confused Sam on the floor of her bedroom. "I told you no." and she left with that. Knowing this was no longer a safe place Leah grabbed Daniel's diaper bag and went out the front door.

* * *

She had no idea what she was doing here. It was the only place she could think of where they had no bounds, but she hadn't even thought of a great story to him. If he denied her a place to stay, she literately had nowhere. She could always try to go back to Oregon, but then she'd be back at square one. She knew they'd find her, but it wasn't about that, here they couldn't make her go home. She wasn't just some runaway teen, she was legally an adult and plus here the the law was definitely on her side.

With all the courage she could manage she knocked on the door. She knew he was home and with her advanced hearing she knew he was the only one home. She knew this was a complete long shot, but it was all she had. She heard boots scuffing the linoleum of the hallway and then a grunt and finally the doored opened. There in front of her was a very tired looking man with surprise etched in every feature of his face.

Leah gave him a very timid smile and secured Daniel in her arms before she spoke very quietly.

"Hi, Chief Swan"


	10. Nowhere To Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leah adjusts to life at the Swans.

Sam had notified the pack and the elders immediately after the shock wore off. Everybody was perplexed at how Leah could just blatantly defy the alpha order. She was stubborn, but not that stubborn. Also everybody wondered why she could defy it now and not earlier. An emergency council meeting had been called and every member of the pack, all the elders, and even the imprints were there.

Voices we're overlapping to the point that nothing could be understood. Sue, being very much a no nonsense kind of person, whistled at frequency that might have even cut glass. Everybody quieted down immediately. Their attention was automatically brought to Sue.

"Alright now that everyone's quiet let's start one at a time. Sam. Why don't you tell us exactly what happened?"

Sam nodded and shifted awkwardly in his stance. "Okay. After you came to me I went over immediately. When I got there I found Leah in her rocking chair with Daniel. I tried to get her to give him back without the order first, but as always in Leah fashion, she refused. So I resorted to the alpha order. For a moment I thought she was going to do as I said and give in, but she just stayed in the chair shaking and told me no. I could tell she was struggling, so I repeated the order thinking that would push her over the edge and she'd give in, but she didn't. I was really frustrated at this point so I decided if she wasn't going to do it herself I do it for her. I tried to grab Daniel from her but she kicked me to the ground. I was a little shocked at this point, so I didn't think to stop her when she left the room. I don't know exactly where she went, but her scent goes into forks so I'm assuming she's somewhere there."

Sue looked at Sam intently with confusion etched in her features. "So my daughter broke the alpha order, just like that. Are you sure you used it. My daughter can be beyond obstinate, but I doubt that she's that stubborn."

Sam looked at Sue slightly annoyed. "I am very sure I used the alpha order and it's not like she didn't struggle with it, there was some effort on her part to do it."

Old Quil spoke next. "I don't understand. Nowhere in our legends show evidence of anybody breaking an alpha order."

"Well, nowhere in or legends show evidence female wolf either." Billy spoke with calmly with authority. "But you're wrong. Our legends do show evidence of an alpha order being broken, but it was only done by another alpha which means this would only be possible if Jacob had defied the order. So, the question still remains how she defied Sam."

The all were silent after he spoke, truly taking in what he said and trying to find a logical answer to his question.

Old Quil was the one to break the silence. "Perhaps because he's not the true alpha, his orders do not hold as much power so they _can_ be broken."

"No if that were true I would have been able to break Sam's order when he forbade me from telling Bella our secret. I had go around the order and find the loophole and even that didn't break it. It just made it useless."

"So we're back at square one again with no answers still." Billy was mildly annoyed that no answers had been found yet. Though they had only been discussing this for a little while he knew there weren't many possibilities, so they should have already had answer.

"I honestly don't know how she did it, but I think we should track her down and bring her back immediately before she loses control and hurts Daniel." Sam said realizing that the elders had no answers for him.

"And how do you suppose you do that without actually hurting Daniel? She already knows how to refuse an alpha order and you all physically forcing her hand guarantees she's loses her temper and endangers Daniel's life. Right now, leaving her be is in Daniel's favor." Sue spoke with more authority than any of the men in the room could ever muster, letting everybody know that was the end of that discussion.

"Sue's right. Daniel's best chance is keeping Leah as happy as possible until we can get him safe distance from Leah." Billy said conferring with Sue.

"I don't understand how Leah could do this. She knows the risk just as well as we do. Why would she risk her own child's life just to get away from us?" Emily spoke up for the first time, concern lacing every word in her voice.

"In all due respect _Emily_ , I don't think you know the first thing when it comes to my daughter. She would never take such a high risk for something this petty with someone she loves especially her own child. She does not feel she is a risk to Daniel, which is enough for me right now until I know he's definitely safe."

Emily was taken back a little with Sue's tone. She was not used to such hostility especially in a public setting. She'd hoped by now at least Sue would forgive her especially since Leah came back, but Leah's ability to hold a grudge had to come from somewhere and it most definitely wasn't Harry. He was so nice that sometimes it hindered his competence in making decisions.

Billy spoke trying to restore order to what was about to become a cat fight of sorts. "I think we should get back to the matter at hand, does anybody have any ideas on how this is possible. Why can Leah defy the alpha order while nobody else can?"

"I have an idea?" Seth said timidly with little confidence in his voice.

The elder's looked at each other as though already deciding that his answer was wrong, but let him speak any ways.

Seth nodded and began to speak. "Well, when I was in the fourth grade I did this research project on wolves." Everybody groaned at the mention of fourth grade.

"What does your elementary School project have to do with Leah?" Paul spoke out of turn saying what everybody was thinking, but were too polite to voice.

"Well if you'd shut up, I'd tell you." Everybody reluctantly stayed quiet and let him speak. "As I was saying I did this research project on wolves. And in a normal wolf pack there's this misconception about there always being an alpha and it being passed on through birthright. Wolves have a tendency to act more like nuclear families. The head of the pack is usually the mother and the father of the pups. Other non-related wolves can join the pack but the _'alpha'_ is generally determined by who has offspring together and it's both the male and the female not just one."

"So you're saying Leah's like the second alpha of the pack?" It was Jacob who spoke out of turn this time.

"Yeah, well it makes sense since Sam and Leah are the only ones who have _'offspring'_ together."

Everybody looked thoughtful after that. They never expected Seth's idea to make so much sense let alone more than likely be the answer."

"So Leah can refuse the alpha order because she's another alpha, but why now? Why couldn't she do this when she first phased?" Billy asked the second question that had been on everybody's mind.

"Well Leah never really tried to fight the alpha order, just Sam. Every time Leah fought Sam on something it was always just a normal order and then I'd have to step in." Jacob brought a little more clarity to the situation.

"So by my calculations, we just collectively pissed off a leader of our tribe and let her walk away." Quil chimed in blunt as ever and everybody grimaced.

"Unfortunately Quil is correct, but we won't really know anything definitely until we get Leah back." Everybody grimaced even more at Billy's words. How the hell were they going to get a cooperative Leah to come back to people who had treated as nothing but a burden?

* * *

Leah awkwardly sat on Charlie's couch holding Daniel in her arms. She had a wool blanket draped across the both of them. She had no idea where to start or really if her cover story would be good enough, but she did know that Charlie was a good man and no matter what she said, he would never turn away a scared girl with nowhere to turn, which is what she was as of this afternoon. It really started to sink in that she had no home for her and her son to go to and if Charlie turned her down she'd be officially homeless.

Blinking back the tears that were forming in her eyes she turned to Charlie. "I bet you're wondering what I'm doing here?" God she sounded pathetic. Never in her entire life had she been so shy, but never in her life had she felt so helpless. Despite her power move over Sam earlier, she knew that would come back to bite her in the ass in the form of nine wolves and there was no way she could take on nine wolves while protecting her son from herself and them. She need a buffer, one who couldn't know anything about the supernatural and Charlie was exactly that.

Daniel shifted in her arms to get closer her warmth; she supposed walking all the way from La Push to Forks in the cold rain with an infant wasn't the greatest idea. At least her elevated temperature served as a kind of heater for him so he shouldn't get hypothermia. Leah shifted him so he was closer to her.

Leah kept trying to form sentences, but nothing came out. She was about to get up and leave and take her chances out there, but Charlie spoke first. "Leah, I can tell you a little bit frazzled so just start by telling me why you're here."

"I needed a place to stay that wasn't on the reservation and this was the first place I could think of."

"And is there a reason you can't stay on the reservation?"

Leah nodded. "They want to take my son away from me."

"Why do they want to take our son?"

"They think I can't take care of him, which technically I can't without a home, but that's beside the point."

"Why all of a sudden now? You've been back for nearly two months."

This is where she really had to think fast. "Well it's not all of a sudden now, it's just I'm finding out now. They wanted me to give him to Sam and Emily so that he had a stable two parent home and have me visit. I couldn't give him away in the hospital; I most indefinitely can't do that now, especially to Sam and Emily." She knew she was a little more than stretching the truth, but she need an extreme enough circumstance that would send her here.

"Can they even do that? I know I have no authority on the reservation, but that doesn't sound like something that's even legal there."

"They can do it if the council votes on it, which is tomorrow, but they can't really do anything if I'm not on the reservation."

Charlie looked at Leah skeptically. He may not know much about reservation politics, but he knew they didn't take children away from their mother's just for the sake of social convention. But Leah looked truly scared, which wasn't a quality seen often in the years he'd watched her grow up. All his instincts told him that there was more to the story, but all his instincts also told him he wasn't getting the answers tonight. So with Harry in mind he told her. "You can stay here as long as you need."

Leah smiled at the man in front of her. She saw the look of incredulity cross his face and was worried she'd be tossed out, but like already knew, he was a good man and good men don't toss women with nowhere. She was tempted to hug him, but that would be a little difficult with Daniel in her arms plus he was never a particularly affectionate man.

"Thank you. Thank you, so much. I'll try not to be a burden."

"Leah, you could never be a burden. An annoyance. Yes. But a burden, never."

Leah laughed at his lame joke it had been a while since anybody had thought of her as anything but a burden. Even her own mother had thought of her as one especially since her transformation.

"Well I hate to be an annoyance already, but I left in quite a hurry and none of mine nor Daniel's stuff is with me. Do you think you can, at any time you want, go over there and collect some of my stuff since I can't go back to the reservation any time soon. The only thing I remembered to grab was his diaper bag, which is actually useful, but I'm going to need more at some point."

Charlie gave Leah a tiny smile "Yes Leah, I'll go tomorrow."

"Thank you chief." Charlie nodded, then reclined back in his chair, unmuted the television and continued to watch the football game. Leah decided to watch the game with him. She didn't care much for football, but it was nice just to relax for a moment and not worry about the imminent death of her and her loved ones.

the game was halfway through the third quarter when saw Daniel make the face that told her she had about 30 seconds to get him a bottle before he started the waterworks. Leah was on the floor in the living room mixing his formula when Bella came home smelling sickeningly sweet. The sudden sound of the door opening started Daniel and he started screaming. She immediately stopped is wails by putting the bottle in his mouth.

* * *

Bella walked into the living room with curiosity etched in her features. Last time she checked, she knew no one with a baby. When she saw Leah on the floor she was even more confused. She had never met this beautiful woman in her life and yet she seemed so familiar. She waved her hand awkwardly in the air and said "Hi" with uncertainty and then turned to her father and silently asked him who the woman sitting in her living room feeding a baby was.

Charlie for once took the social cue. "Bella, this is Leah Clearwater. Harry's daughter. Leah, this is my daughter Bella"

At mention of the name Leah recognition took place in Bella's mind. She was the one Edward told her was the reason so much drama took place in the pack. From what Edward had told her, she understood why she was in so much pain, but what she didn't get was why she took it out on everybody who wasn't directly involved in hurting. Of all the things she learned from Edward that night, the thing that shocked her the most was Emily. She was so kind to her when was in La Push, she couldn't imagine such an act of betrayal coming from her. She supposed supernatural forces could do that to people, she having experienced first hand, that sometimes, you don't have a choice.

Bella was brought out of her thoughts at the sound Leah's voice. "Hi Bella," she said with a smile so fake that even she could detect it. Bella automatically wonder what she had done earn such hostility from the woman. She supposed it could be because she hung around vampires, but none of the other wolves had treated her like that before. Well except Paul, but she guessed that had more to do with his personality than it actually had to do with her or her involvement with vampires.

"Nice to meet you Leah." And that was the last thing said between them before Bella quickly made her way out of the room. Leah made her feel very uncomfortable and she wanted to steer clear of her as much as she could. Bella went to the kitchen to started dinner. Spaghetti, she hope that was enough for everybody.


	11. House Guest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leah's not a big fan of Edward's late night visits

When Bella learned about the new residents in their house she had taken it well, for the most part. She probably would have been more open to the idea had Leah shown her at least one act of kindness. And then there were Edward's late night visits and how this was most likely was going to hinder that. Plus there's the fact that she came with a baby. They're not known for sleeping through the night and she had a hard enough time getting enough sleep as it was. But she didn't show any apprehension when Charlie had told her. He said she was having a hard time on the reservation and needed to get away. From everything she'd learned about Leah, she was having a hard year. But what prompted her to come here and why now? If Bella was a more assertive person she'd ask, but that just wasn't her nature and plus Leah wasn't the most approachable person on a good day. She highly doubted that had changed.

Bella was getting sheets out of the linen closet to set up a makeshift bed for Leah; she even grabbed a few extra pillows to cage Daniel in since he didn't have crib of any variety. Bella made it downstairs to the couch and was about to set everything up when Leah stopped her.

"I can do that myself, but thanks."

"Oh, I just thought it'd be a little difficult because you can only use one hand." Bella replied a little timidly. She had no idea how Leah managed to intimidate her in her house with a simple few words, but she succeeded.

"Trust me, you get used to doing one handed things. I have everything I need you can go now." Leah was a little short with that last statement, but Bella complied nonetheless. She wasn't in the mood for confrontation, plus this was hindering her time with Edward already.

Bella made to the top the stairs and ran into Charlie. She was about to head towards her room when he stopped her. "Hey Bella, can we talk for a moment?"

"Sure, Dad." She said with a weary smile. There were very few times in her life when Charlie asked to talk and almost all of them weren't good. The latest one sprang to mind and she hoped Leah's baby didn't spark another sex talk.

"I know I dropped this whole Leah thing on you, I just wanted to make sure you were okay with it." Bella smiled at this. She knew nothing she said would get him to kick Leah out, but she appreciated him considering her feelings about it. Plus this definitely wasn't a sex talk and she could appreciate that on any day.

"It's fine, Dad. She needs our help, we'll give it." She said firmly and she meant it. The circumstances may not have been ideal and Leah could be a lot nicer, but that doesn't mean she doesn't deserve help.

Charlie smiled at his daughter's generosity. It's been a while since he's gotten to that side of her. He chalked it up to normal teenage egocentrism for her inconsiderate behavior as of late and was glad it hadn't taken over her completely. "Well that's good because it's not going to be that easy. She's as stubborn as they come and got little too much pride, so she might not be the most pleasant person to be around."

_You have no idea._ She was tempted to say but stuck with "I'll do my best to ignore it." And smiled at him

Charlie smiled back. "That's my girl. Well that's all I wanted to talk about so goodnight kiddo."

"Night Dad." She said quietly and went to her room.

* * *

Leah lay on the couch with Daniel on top of her. He was out like a light drooling all over her shirt but she didn't care. She missed everything about him including the messy parts. She laid her hand on his back and stroked him gently. He stirred a bit, but nothing to indicate he was walking up any time soon.

She was trying to sleep, but that was a bit hard when there was a vampire less than 25 feet away from you and you're a werewolf who could hear and smell everything. She was tempted to go up there and remove him from the premises, but she knew as a guest in this house and Forks, she had absolutely no right. She may be done with La Push and its inhabitants, but that didn't mean she wanted to start a war. Her son was at least as close as possible, so she knew he was safe.

She didn't quite understand what he was still doing here. After unintentionally hearing mindless chatter from them, Bella had reluctantly fallen asleep. Leah had hoped that that would be his queue to leave so that she could be comfortable enough to sleep, but he just stayed. That was about an hour and a half ago and it was nearing one o'clock in the morning. She knew at most she had two hours before Daniel was due wake for a changing and feeding. She knew he was the mind reader and had be leaving subtle (or as subtle as she gets) hints in her head for him to leave, but apparently he wasn't getting the message.

She probably had been screaming _GET OUT_ a hundred thousand times before she got a response, just not the one she was hoping.

"I'm not leaving her." He said in his all too perfect velvety voice. She heard it as clear as day from her spot on the couch.

Mindful of her sleeping son she whispered her response to minimize the amount of vibration coming from her chest. "I don't know what universe you come from, but going home isn't leaving someone, it's giving them space. Necessary space, especially since their unconscious."

Edward chuckled at her added commentary. "I like watching her sleep. Also she gets anxious if I leave. She thinks I won't come back."

Leah huffed. _Seriously!_ She thought. _You won't let me sleep because you don't know how to solve your girlfriend's trust issues?!_

"Which by the way, this isn't it" She said aloud a little too loudly. Daniel made a small noise in protest but quickly went back to sleep.

"Well Leah, with all your years of wisdom. What would you suggest I do?" Edward said with a subtle hint of sarcasm in his voice.

She didn't want to disturb Daniel again so she chose to respond in her head. _Well first, I'd lose the attitude unless you want the Swan's home to become the site of a murder. And second, I don't know, but what I do know is that what you're doing isn't working. In fact it's making it worse. All of your problems are being ignored by both of you in hope that it'll go away, but unfortunately they're still there and will continue to be there_ _ **until you stop ignoring them**_ _. In the meantime your presence is causing her to become a pathetic little girl who has zero consideration for others. So my real suggestion would be you leave her all together, but that doesn't seem to be something that's happening anytime soon, at least not tonight._

"What would have you think Bella is pathetic in any sense of the word, let alone in my presence?" Leah could hear the irritation in his voice and smiled. If she couldn't sleep at least she could get a rise out of him.

She then thought of the conversation she overheard earlier between Bella and her father. Her answers sounded genuine and for the first time she saw a glimpse into what Jacob went on and on about. She was actually not that bad of a person and Leah's opinion almost changed about her, but then she went back to her room and back to Edward and every formed opinion Leah had of Bella was proven just from the things she heard alone. She was talking about turning soon and having to make her parents think she's dead. She said it like it was the only choice in the world and that those consequences weren't serious. She sounded even more like a petulant child when Edward tried to get her to rethink it and she adamantly said that it was her choice to make. Even if Leah didn't have a child to look after she would never have made such a life or death decision over Sam, just for her mom and Seth alone. But then again, she never thought of herself being that desperate for Sam, ever.

Leah didn't wait up for a response because she knew there wouldn't be one. She hoped it was because he saw that she was right on some level, but knew it had more to with the fact that not much else could be said. She had her firm opinion that wasn't changing and he had his.

* * *

Sue was in her kitchen cooking to keep busy. She had no idea what to do with herself; Harry wasn't around anymore to help keep her anxiety at bay. She was having flashbacks to almost a year ago when Leah first ran away. She hoped she didn't lose her daughter for that long again.

She kept thinking over and over again _If I only had faith in her._ She knew the likelihood of Leah phasing too close to Daniel was nearly impossible, but she didn't want to take a chance that it didn't because that would be devastating on everybody especially Leah. But now looking back she realized she should have trusted or at least explained her actions better. Perhaps she shouldn't have called Sam over. That is probably where her real mistake lied, but at the time she thought _act now, explain later._ Later never came and now she was more worried than ever. Her daughter was out there alone with a baby and vampires were going to be running loose in the area soon. None of that sounded good in her head.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a knock at the door. She quickly scrambled to wash her hands and ran to the door. She had no idea who would come to it especially since no one ever bothered to knock anymore, but she hoped it had to do with her daughter.

When she got the door open she was surprised to see it was Chief Swan. It had been a while since they last spoke and he wasn't usually the one to stop by for surprise visits.

He smiled at her before he spoke. "Hey Sue."

She couldn't help but smile back; he had a great smile that rarely got used. "Hey Chief. What brings you out to this neck of the woods?" She opened the door wider and motioned for him to come in.

He let out a weary sigh and then stepped into the Clearwater home. "Well, Leah asked me to come by and pick up some of her stuff." He looked at Sue and waited for her reaction.

Sue was perplexed. Why would Leah ask Chief Swan to get her stuff? And why does he know the whereabouts of her daughter while she's completely clueless? She had no idea how to respond so she settled for staring blankly at him in hopes that he'd elaborate further.

Charlie shifted his feet right to left and put his hands in his pockets. "She came to me last night saying something about the counsel trying to take away her son." He kept it vague in hopes that he'd get the real reason he had a scared 19 year old come to his house unannounced.

Sue's eyes widened at Charlie's statement. She wondered just how much Leah had disclosed. She doubted she included anything about werewolves. Charlie seemed way too calm for that revelation. She decided to play it safe and be as ambiguous as possible. "It's a little more complicated than that."

"Right." He said clearly dissatisfied with her answer. It went quiet for a while. "So. Her stuff?"

Sue snapped out of whatever daze she was in. "Oh. Right. Do you need help gathering what she needs?"

"If it wouldn't be too much trouble, I don't have too much experience guessing what girls need."

Sue laughed at this. He was always a simple man, not very attuned with much outside of beer and sports. "Come on right this way."

Sue basically packed everything Leah and Daniel would need while Charlie just stood in the doorway. She packed things he never would have thought of, which made him even more grateful that she had taken the reigns. He had everything packed in the cruiser and was about to leave, but Sue stopped him. "Is she okay? I mean obviously she's alive, but how did she seem to you."

Charlie looked into Sue's worried eyes and told her as much as he could, which sadly wasn't very much. "Overall she seemed alright, but here were moments I could tell that it's getting to be too much for her." Her eyes started to tear up at that last statement especially knowing that she was included in what's "too much" for her to handle. "Look she can stay with me as long as she'd like and maybe her getting away for a bit will help her in the long run and she'll come home soon. I know she'll miss you eventually at least." Sue gave him a small smile that didn't quite reach her eyes, but she knew he was right.

"Well I'll let you go get this stuff to Leah."

"Yeah." He walked to his side of the car and right before he got into the car he said one last thing. "If you need anything just call."

"Thank you. I appreciate it." She said with a genuine smile this time and waved as he drove away.


	12. Monsters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jacob comes over.

Normally Jake would be pissed to be on Leah duty again, but at least this time he got something out of it. It had been about two weeks since Leah's departure and the tribe had decided to finally untuck their tails and do something about it. Usually they would have done that with excessive force, but the past had proved that that wasn't the best approach when it came to Leah. Plus, if Seth was right, she might be able to alpha order them all away from her indefinitely and then they'd be two steps back with no way to go forward.

He was standing in front of Bella's front door about to knock when the door suddenly opened. In front of him was the Chief in full uniform headed towards his car, but was blocked by the massive Quileute.

"Hey Jake, whatcha doin' here? I haven't seen you here since the incident." He inflected that last part remembering just how upset Bella had been.

"Yeah I came to apologize for that and invite her to a bonfire we're having tonight."

"Oh well, come on in. Bella's in her room. I'd escort you in, but I gotta get going to the station."

"It's alright Charlie, I know my way around. I hope everything's alright at the station."

"It's not. They found another dead body in the woods. You should watch out for yourself." Charlie looked seriously worried as he said this. He normally wouldn't share such details with anybody, but this case was getting a little close to home and he wanted to at least have the people he loved on high alert.

"Don't worry about me Charlie. I can take care of myself." More capable than you think. He thought as Charlie's face turned into one of disapproval.

"I know you can take care of yourself. Just be more careful. We don't know what's killin' these folks and I have a feeling it can take even you down." He said earnestly. He knew Jake as big, but based off what he's seen off these dead bodies, he wasn't sure that the entire police force could stop it if they tied.

"I will be Chief." He said as he walked past Charlie and into the house.

When he got into the house he was pleasantly surprised to not smell such a strong stench of leech. He supposed that was due to Leah. As he walked further down the hall he focused on the sounds around him. Leah was obviously in the living room with Daniel and Bella was in her room. He guessed she was doing homework by the sounds of pen on paper were filling his ears in that direction.

He turned the corner to the living room and found Leah on the floor with Daniel on their stomachs. Daniel had his head up concentrating really hard on grabbing the toy that was in Leah's hand. Leah was cooing at her baby, marveling at his every adorable little move and expression. Jake walked straight toward her and sat on the couch near where she was lying on the floor.

Leah briefly moved her eyes to Jake before returning her attention back to her son. "Don't you get tired of them always sending you to get to me?"

Jake chuckled lightly at this. "I'll admit, being sent to go get the most stubborn, and bitchy woman on the planet does have its drawbacks, but at least this time I get to see Bella in the process."

Leah gave him a look of chagrin before giving him a fake smile. "Well, at least there's that." She turned back to cooing at her son and ignored Jake.

Jake let out a puff of air and prepared for the onslaught of stubbornness that was surely to come. Jake slid off the couch and on to the floor next to Leah and Daniel. "So this is the little guy. I've never actually seen him this close, except of course in your memories and I think we both know what a poor substitute that is." He was silent for a moment and prepared himself for what he was going to say next. It was going to sound really offensive, but he hoped it had the desired effect. "He's cute, I can see the appeal, but is he really worth being around leeches constantly. I mean have you really even thought about it, he could phase this early. He's the product of two werewolves and in the constant presence of the thing that triggers the curse. Leah you're not the only one in danger."

"You know scaring me with uncertainties isn't your best tactic. Everything you just mentioned is a very slim possibility while there is a very large possibility that they'll take away my son. Try again." Leah didn't even look away from Daniel.

"Well, it was worth a shot. But if you aren't coming back to us now, why don't you come to the bonfire tonight and then decide later. You know, make all requests and negotiations in person instead of acting like we're in the 5th grade."

"If my memory is correct, I'm not the one acting like a 5th grader. They sent you not the other way around. And why would I go to a bonfire they're throwing. Are you telling me that everybody's opinions just magically changed over the course of two weeks? Or are you guys just trying to get me there and never let me leave. Besides, I don't have a babysitter and there's no way in hell I'm letting him go anywhere near that reservation until I know you guys won't try to take him."

"You could ask Bella to babysit." He said with a skeptical smile.

His skepticism was met with a look of her own. "I don't trust her to keep herself alive, let alone my kid."

"Well there's Charlie. He's kept most of this town alive, I'm sure a five month old baby shouldn't be too much of a stretch."

"I think I'm enough of a burden on him, I don't need him taking over responsibilities that are mine." She said curtly.

"Leah, they're not going to take your kid. Wait let me rephrase that; they can't take your kid." If the scare tactic wasn't going to work he might as well go with the truth.

"They had no trouble doing it before, why would they have any now?"

"True, but that was before you defied an alpha order. Knowing that alone means they're not going to try anything."

"As defiant as I may be, I don't think I can take on seven wolves. Try again."

"No really, you may not be able to take on seven wolves, but you might be able give an alpha order to stop them."

Leah had to laugh at that. "How exactly do you expect me to give an alpha order? I'm not an alpha."

"That may or may not be true, but as far as they're concerned, you are. At least that's the running theory. No one, not even me, has been able to resist an alpha order. Which not only makes you more special than before, but scary. They don't what you're capable of and they're not going to risk anything over a concern that's proved to be unnecessary." He spoke very earnestly and Leah's resolve was weakening.

Leah sat up and picked Daniel up to put him in her lap. She put a toy in his hands to occupy him before he got fussy about the abrupt movement. "Okay say I believe you. Why do you guys want me there so bad?"

"Like I said before, the running theory is that you're an alpha. Which if that's true, we have an alpha of our tribe unprotected outside the reservation and on Cullen land. Not really something they want. Look just come to the bonfire tonight. They are completely at your mercy because they don't know what else to do."

He got up and left Leah to her thoughts. Controlling Leah was never the best tactic, it seemed best to leave the conversation open ended so that she could come to her own conclusion. He just hoped she chose to go tonight. 

* * *

Bella was in her room working on one of her final essays of the year. It should have been a breeze, but with her mind on so many other things she found herself having trouble with even the simplest tasks. She had written the same sentence five different times before she realized that she was going nowhere with her point. She was very thankful for the knock at the door until she heard the voice that came after it.

"Bella?" Jacob's voice rang loud and clear through the door. Bella made a point to ignore him, especially after what he did. She had enough to deal with from Edward and the newborns, she didn't need Jacob's misplaced feelings also, but he seemed determined to make her deal with it anyway by coming here.

"I know you're in there. I can hear your heart beat. Look I'm not here to cause any trouble just came to ask you something."

She stayed planted exactly where she was. As far as she was concerned, he could stay out there for an eternity.

"You know you're going to have to come out of your room at some point and when you do I'll be here and you won't be able to avoid me. So why delay it?" He knew he had her there, but she had a nasty habit of being stubborn to the point of stupidity.

Bella rolled her eyes at his statement, he may be right, but that didn't mean she had to give in. "Whatever you want to ask me, you can say it through the door."

"That may be true, but I didn't make a trip all the way out into leech land to talk to you through a door."

"Well maybe you shouldn't have made the trip at all." She was getting very annoyed with where this conversation was going. One of his best and worst traits was his persistence. It was the one thing she still hadn't quite figured out how to beat.

"Well, I did. And unless you have a time machine or a cool power that involves time travel I'm staying here until we can talk face to face."

Giving in to defeat, Bella groaned and opened her bedroom door with more force than necessary. "There. Happy." She then walked over to her bed and sat down to glare at him. "What question was so important that you had to come all the way out into 'leech land'?" She used air quotes to emphasize the last words.

"Well first I wanted to apologize for being an asshole. No girl deserves to be subject to unwanted advances, but you have to realize, I'm desperate. Your life has a shorter time table and I'm just trying to get you to see that it doesn't need to end here."

"Jake, for the last time, I'm not dying. It's the exact opposite and you need to realize that soon because it's happening whether you want it to or not. I'm going to be with Edward forever."

There was a pregnant pause. Jake wanted tell her that she didn't need to become one of them just to be with Edward, but he knew from past experience that that argument was going to get him nowhere. "Look Bella, I didn't come here to argue about that again. I came here to invite you to a bonfire the tribe's having tonight as an 'I'm sorry' gesture."

"And I'm guessing by declining your invite that would be the equivalent of not forgiving you." She had a slightly amused tone in her voice.

"Exactly and I just couldn't live with myself knowing you were still mad at me." Though sarcasm was evident in his voice, he meant what he said.

Bella rolled her eyes and let out a chuckle. "Well, I guess I have to go. We wouldn't want to have to put you suicide watch especially over me."

Jake laughed humorlessly at her comment. It hit a little too close to home. "So, I'll meet you at the border at eight. If Leah agrees come too, please give her a ride, but knowing her she won't agree. So, can you at least try? To get her to go tonight, she might be incline if she had a way of getting there." His voice was slightly monotonic and Bella knew she had said something wrong.

Jake then walked out of her room and out of the house.

"I'll try." She said quietly long after he'd gone. She got off of the bed and went back to her abandoned essay with even more on her mind.

* * *

Bella had given up on her essay after about an hour of producing nothing. She hated to hurt Jake even though at this point it was from his own design. Being mad at him had actually temporarily lifted the burden of his pain from her conscious, but now it was back in full swing.

Deviating away from her thoughts on that subject, she decided to work on his request, which luckily was something she could actually fulfill, kind of. He asked her to try, not accomplish and she knew that she of all people wasn't exactly the best for getting Leah Clearwater to do stuff.

When she made it into the living room she found Leah on the couch watching TV. Daniel was in his playpen napping. She sat down in her father's chair.

It was a full three minutes before she spoke. She knew she had to try, she just didn't quite think of how. "So, Leah, any plans tonight?" she didn't sound too sure of herself, but that might just be because Leah was intimidating especially when she was ignoring you.

"Nope." Leah didn't even look away from the screen when she answered.

"Well, if you do decide to have plans, I, well Edward, can give you a ride." She probably shouldn't have mentioned Edward. Leah had no problem letting her dislike for Edward known. It usually wouldn't be a problem, as many of the other werewolves felt the same way, but her attitude towards her boyfriend had caused him to visit her at her home less often. It may not have been that much less time spent together, but to her it felt like an eternity.

Leah turned and looked at Bella with a glare set on her face. "Why would I ever get into a car with you or your leech?"

"Because you have no other options?" Though Bella knew she was right, she said it like a question. She called it the Leah effect. In the very few interactions she had with Leah prior to all this craziness, she still had this essence about her that always made Bella second guess herself.

"Well, I guess it's good that I have no plans." Leah turned back to the television.

"You know, going home, even if just for a few hours, might be nice. I know you have to at least miss you mother and Seth."

"Yeah it'll be a nice reunion, until they take my son away and forbid from leaving." Leah was still focusing on the TV making Bella feel even more ignored.

"Well you don't have to take your son with you. Charlie is perfectly capable of babysitting."

"And burden your father even further with my problems. Yeah, no thanks."

"Well my friend Angela can babysit. I mean she does it all the time with her twin brothers, so I'm guessing she's pretty good at it."

This intrigued Leah a little. "You have friends outside of Jake and the leeches? That's surprising; I thought you had a monster only policy when it came to friends."

"They're not monsters and you realize you just called yourself one too."

"Yeah, because I am a monster, just not as much of one as your little leeches." Leah made sure to emphasized "little leeches".

Bella was starting to tear up in anger. "What would you know about my 'little leeches', you haven't even spent one minute with them to even know them."

"I know enough to know that each and every one of them has at least murder someone at some point which counts as a monster in my book."

"Not all of them, not Carlisle." She said with conviction.

"Really, then how did he get most of his family? What do you call his method which involves stopping their heart and every other sign of life in their body?"

"You can't kill the dying."

"Keep telling yourself whatever you need to justify it in your head, but no matter how you spin it, they're murderers."

Bella got a really hard look on her face as she said her next words. "If you do decide to have plans, you can walk. Angela's number is in the phone book under Webber. She's a really good babysitter." And with that she left house and went to see Edward.


	13. Bonfire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A lot happens in one night

The sun was about to set when Leah heard the phone ring. Normally she wouldn't answer the phone because it wasn't her house, but no one was home. Daniel was safe in his playpen babbling to himself, so Leah left the living room to answer the phone in the kitchen.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Leah? Is Bella around?" Charlie's surprised voice came through the receiver. She usually never answered the phone.

"No, she went to the Cullen's a few hours ago. Why? Do you need me tell her something?"

"No, I was just calling to tell her I'll be at the station late tonight and to just order a pizza for dinner if you guys got hungry."

"Oh. Okay I'll be sure to tell her when she gets home. So what's got you at work late? Nothing ever happens in Forks."

"Yeah, usually. But there's been bodies showing up in the woods. The victims were from Seattle and they're deaths were similar to the victims of the string of gang activity there, so we're a little busy with their police department." This pique Leah's interest. While she was dealing with her drama she forgot about the actual threat coming towards her and the people she cared about, a threat that had wolves patrolling the area and had actually infiltrated this home once.

"That sounds serious. I hope you guys catch whoever's doing it soon." She lied smoothly. She knew exactly what was doing it and hoped Charlie never came into contact with.

"Yeah I hope so too, Leah. So stay safe." She was the last person he had to worry about, but she appreciated the sentiment. She grabbed the outdated phonebook that was next to the phone. She stopped before she opened it.

"Hey, before you hang up, can you tell me the last name Bella's friend Angela is? I need to find her number, but I don't know where to look."

"Oh the minister's daughter, Weber, Weber's the last name. Why do you need her number?" He couldn't imagine why Leah would need to talk to her especially since Bella really hadn't hung out with her lately.

"No reason, Bella just mentioned her to me and she seemed like a nice person, so I thought I'd give her a call." She didn't want Charlie to know that she was going to La Push so she told him the best lie she could think of.

"Yeah, she's a good kid, really great friend to Bella." There was an awkward pause. "Well I have to get back to work, so I'll let you go."

"Okay, bye Charlie"

"Bye, Leah." There was a click and then a dial tone before Leah hung up.

Leah took the phone book into the living room to check on Daniel. He was on his back grasping one of his toys and chewing on it. His eyes traveled over to his mother's briefly and then went back to his toy.

Leah was a little offended that he gave no reaction to her returning to the room, but all the baby books she'd read said that that was a good sign and that he was developing a secure attachment to her. This was reassuring to her since she had no idea what damage leaving had caused him. He seemed to be resilient and it's not like she never saw him during this period, so he always knew she was near.

There was only one Weber in the phonebook, not surprising since it was such a small town. The phone only rang three times before an unfamiliar male voice picked up.

"Hello?"

"Hello. Umm is Angela there?" She sounded unsure. Though this obviously had to be the number, she still wasn't quite sure who she was supposed to be calling.

"Yeah, she's in her room. May I ask who's calling?" This made Leah panic for a moment. Angela obviously didn't know her so she may not take the call.

"Leah. Umm look, she doesn't know me, but I'm staying with Chief Swan and his daughter Bella said I should call her." Keeping with the same lie as she told Charlie.

"Okay, no problem, just let me go get her." She heard shuffling as he went to go get Angela. Through the receiver she could hear a knock and then a delicate female voice saying "come in".

"There's a Leah on the phone for you. Bella Swan told her to call you? Do you have any idea why she would do that?" It was muffled on the other end meaning Mr. Weber had obviously put his hand over the microphone, but Leah's exceptional hearing could pick up everything.

"No? I haven't really talked to Bella much lately. I wonder what it could be about."

"Well only one was to find out." The noises on the other end indicated he was transferring the phone to his daughter.

"Hello? Leah?"

"Yeah, Angela?" Leah sounded weirdly unsure of who was on the other end even though it was obviously her.

"Yeah, umm you called?" This girl must be very nice because she not only took a call from a complete stranger, but also was still on the line after all this awkwardness.

"Yeah, Bella said were a good babysitter and you might be able to help me tonight."

"Oh, yeah I'm free tonight. Who do you want me to babysit?"

"My son, he's five months. Is that too young for you to take care of. I know some like them to be at least two."

"No, five month's is fine. I used to take care of my brothers when they were that age all the time; I imagine not much has changed in care taking since then." Angela sounded genuine over the phone. Leah expected at least a little apprehension about babysitting a stranger's kid, but found none.

"Yeah they kind of just eat, sleep and poop. How much do you want to pay you?"

"You don't need to pay me anything. I'll do it for free. My family will be home so they should be able to help too."

"Oh, alright, you don't have to do it for free. I can pay you." She really didn't have the funds, but she really didn't want to take charity.

"I'm sure you can, but you seem to really need my help. Or you probably wouldn't have called a virtual stranger to babysit your kid, so I just want to help." There was no trace of deceit in her voice, she was being completely sincere and Leah couldn't be more grateful for it.

"Thank you." Leah paused for a moment. "What's the latest you can babysit him until, because the place I'm going will probably keep me til 11:00."

"11:00's fine, but my family will probably be in bed when you get back."

"That's fine. I'll see you at 7:30. What's your address?"

"It's 630 Mayberry St. It's close to the High School."

"Kay, I'll see you then and Angela."

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"Bye."

"Bye."

* * *

Leah stood outside Angela's house with her son in a car seat in one hand and a diaper bag on her shoulder. It was a literal picket fence dream home, which is something Leah had little experience with. She wondered if the people inside were as nice as the house. From her interaction on the phone her money was on yes, but her judgement hasn't always been the best. She just hoped her judgement was enough to get her through the night.

She thought about why she was even going to the bonfire tonight. She was firm in her stance not to return to La Push, but that was before she realized the seriousness of what's coming her direction. She obviously knew that a war was coming, but this was the first time the war had been at her doorstep and in order to protect the ones she loved and this town, she needed to go to La Push. She needed the pack. With a sigh of contempt, Leah pushed open the gate and knocked on the Weber's door.

opened the door with a smile positioned on his face. He looked how Leah imagined any pastor to look like right down to the sweater vest.

"You must be Leah?" He said in a very polite voice holding out his hand.

Leah nervously smiled and met his hand in the middle. "Yeah, sorry for the last minute notice."

"It's quite alright Leah. We've never been known to turn down someone in need, no matter the circumstance." And he meant it. Leah usually didn't do pity, especially from strangers, but she was in no position to deny help.

"Well thank you, because I needed help." A nervous chuckle came after that and she gestured toward the inside. He moved to the side and let her in.

"Angela, Leah's here!" He yelled from the bottom of the stairs.

"Be right down!" Moments later Angela came into view and greeted Leah.

"Hey, you must be Leah, and this must be your son…" Angela trailed off realizing she didn't know his name.

"Daniel." She said with a smile. She pulled the car seat up so Angela could get a better view of him.

"Well Daniel, it's nice to meet you. Aren't just the cutest little baby." Angela spoke in a baby voice that bordered annoying, but Leah couldn't disagree with her. Daniel just ate up her words and smiled and made a little noise of approval.

Angela unbuckled him and pulled him into her arms securely. "Awe, seems like you're a happy baby too." Angela gently rocked him a bit before turning to his mother. "So do you want to set up in my room?"

Any doubts Leah had before melted away when she saw how nurturing Angela's nature was. "Yeah"

Angela's room was immaculately organized and large, at least by Leah's standards. She put Daniel's car seat at the end of the bed and his diaper bag along with it.

"So, his bed times at 9:00 so he should be getting sleepy soon. I've already fed and bathed him, so all you have to do is keep him occupied until it's time for bed and make him a bottle. He should stay asleep from then on until I get back; he's been pretty good lately with sleeping through the night. There are lots of diapers and wipes and a couple of extra onesies in case he needs them. Is there anything else I'm forgetting?"

Angela was paying careful attention to Leah's words and concluded that was everything. "That sound like everything. If there's anything else I need, I'm sure we have it in the twin's old stuff. Oh, if there's an emergency how should I get in touch with you?"

"I don't actually have a phone and where I'm going doesn't either, so if there's an emergency just call the Chief and he should be able to help you and get in touch with me."

"Okay so diapers, wipes, onesies, formula, bed time at 9:00 and in case of emergency call the Chief, got it."

"Oh there are a few toys in the bag; his favorite's the frog, so if he gets fussy that should calm him down."

"Kay, toys in bag, frog's his favorite, got it. Anything else?"

"No that's it; he's a pretty easy baby, only gets really distressed when others are distressed." Leah grabbed Daniel out of Angela's arms and held him close to her to kiss him goodbye. "Bye baby. Mommy will be back later." She gave him one last kiss before handing him back to Angela.

As Leah left,Angela used Daniel's arm to wave goodbye to his mom. Daniel's attention was on Leah the whole time she left which made her feel a little guilty and scared at the same time. The last time she left him it was without the guarantee she'd see him again. But Leah pushed through, the only way that would happen was if tonight didn't go peaceful enough, but she doubted violence would take place in such a public place.

* * *

She walked all the way to First Beach; she didn't trust the pack in her mind right now. Daniel was safe in a place they didn't know and she was going to keep it that way. She made her way up to the bonfire and saw quite a few shocked faces. The wolves weren't surprised because they could smell her before she came into view, but the elders wore stunned but pleased expressions on their faces that met her scowl. She may have agreed to come, didn't mean she had to be happy about it.

Leah chose a seat farthest from everyone around the fire. She knew that the pack business wouldn't be discussed until after the legends where told and the civilians had left, so she had a while until anything would pertain to her. Seth looked as though he wanted to talk to her, but the pointed look she sent him made him stay where he was. In fact everyone wanted to speak with her, but her attitude deterred everyone, everyone except Bella Swan.

Bella Swan won the Nobel Prize in stupidity the moment she sat down next to Leah Clearwater. The girl was not great at taking hints and apparently had a death wish.

"I thought you didn't have plans tonight?" She didn't sound critical.

"Well, apparently plans change."

"You didn't have to walk; we could have given you a ride."

Leah looked at Bella as if though she'd had a second head. Less than five hours ago they were having a fight and now she was acting as though nothing had happened. "Yes because a ride with a leach and then puppy sounded more desirable than a walk alone." She ended her statement with a sarcastic smile.

"Sorry, I was just saying. No need to bite my head off." Bella held her hand up in surrender.

Leah scoffed and turned her stare towards the fire. "You apologize too much."

"Sorry." Bella huffed out. Leah turned to look at her as though to say _really._ Bella rolled her rolled her eyes and gave another angry huff. "Seriously, Leah, what is it that I've done to you for you to hate me so much? To criticize every little thing about me?"

"I don't hate you. I can't hate you; you have no identity, personality or really anything resembling being an individual person. You are nothing therefore I can't hate anything."

Bella looked perplexed with her answer. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means you have no identity outside your boyfriend which means you have no identity. So I can't adequately judge anything about you to hate you. I dislike you, but that's for other reasons." Leah wasn't looking at Bella's face a she told her these harsh truths. She just stared at the fire hoping Bella would get the message that she wasn't in the mood to talk and leave before she really had to hurt her feelings.

"So you're telling me my being with Edward means I'm not a person. I don't get how that works."

Leah had to laugh at that. "Well of course you don't. You're blissfully in _love,_ so much so that you've become a pathetic nothing that can't make a decision that doesn't revolve around another person."

Bella was starting to get mad. "I make plenty of decisions that don't revolve around Edward."

"Really, name one. Name one instance where you didn't need Edward for it or Jacob for that matter. Name a time when you were independent enough to think for yourself."

Bella was too overwhelmed with Leah's words to come up with a response. She just kept shaking her head in confusion and anger.

"Having trouble coming up with one? Huh? You see the truth is that Edward makes you pathetic, needy and so utterly dependent on him and what's worse is that you let him. You let him choose who you talk to, when you talk to them, where you go and if god forbid you disagree, you do it anyways. Because someone apparently told you that nothing exists outside of this person. Not you're mother, not your father, hell not even yourself. Someone apparently told you that that means you're in love and in order for it to prevail you must be this non person. So yes Bella you being with Edward means you're not a person and no Bella you don't make plenty of decisions that revolve around Edward because you brain can't fathom it."

Bella scoffed at Leah. "So what? Am I supposed to just be with Jacob because you deem it acceptable?"

Leah snorted. "No. You're someone who defines their whole life by the person their dating. So what happens when you build your entire life around Jacob and he imprints, what do you think that'll do to you? You'll still be just as pathetic and maybe even actually succeed in killing yourself because you don't know how to be your own person. If there's something you're 'supposed to do' it's be alone and figure out who you are. Once that happens then maybe I'd recommend adding people to your life." Though her words were harsh her advice was sincere. Leah stared off into the distance ignoring Bella and everyone else around her. It was clear the wolves had overheard the entire conversation, but nobody else appeared to by the way they continued on like nothing happened.

Bella gaped at Leah without a response. Sure, she'd thought of herself as being pathetic, but not for the reasons Leah just mentioned. In fact, the things Leah just said were the things Bella considered the least pathetic about herself. She felt that her love for Edward and the things that love made her do was what made her strong. To hear her life twisted completely out of context made her want to cry, but she didn't want to do that in public, so she ended up only tearing up.

Bella was brought out of her reverie by Jacob gently touching her arm. He gazed at her with a soft look before his features turned hard and directed at Leah.

"You here less than five minutes and you're already upsetting people. Do you not know how to be nice for once? Your pain is not everyone's fault."

Leah turned her head quickly in Jacob's direction. "Look Black, I don't have the time or patience to deal with other people's feelings. It's not my fault she can't take the hint when someone doesn't want to be bothered. So if you would like to avoid any more instances I'd suggest you take her away from me."

Jacob would have fought more with her, but Bella was upset and that was higher on his priority list. So he stood up with his arm around Bella and left Leah by herself.

Happy to be alone, Leah sat in the sand with her arms around her knees, chin resting on top thinking. She thought about who she was, who she'd become and who she'd like to be.

* * *

Jacob brought Bella to their spot. It was far enough away that they could have complete privacy and it was also a place of sanctuary for both of them. Jacob brought her close to his side with her head resting on his shoulder. "You're not pathetic, Bella."

She snorted. "Yeah, well Leah seems to heavily disagree with you."

Jacob pulled her chin up with his finger and looked straight in to her eyes. "Leah doesn't know you. Not like I do. She doesn't see how selfless you are, you're loyalty and you're ability to never give up on anyone. She just sees someone who's dating a vampire and formed a strong opinion around it."

Bella smiled up at Jacob. "Well she did kind of have a point. I do center my life around Edward."

Jacob gave a slight nod. "Well no one's perfect, but you shouldn't be letting other people tell you who you are. That's something reserved only for you."

She smiled and gave a slight chuckle. "I guess so."

"No guess, know so." He reprimanded.

She rolled her eyes. "I know, only I can define myself."

He gave her a big grin. "Good."

They stayed close staring at each other smiling. Bella's smile gradually faded as she felt their closeness. It reminded her of that day in her truck when she thought he was going to kiss her; though this there was no crippling pain. This felt like a natural progression. She felt herself moving forward to kiss him when Edward's voice saying _be happy_ popped into her head and she realized why she was not in pain. That Edward was here to keep her heart in one piece and that what she was about to do was very wrong, especially after what happened before.

Sensing a shift in mood Jacob stood up from his spot and held his hand out to her. "We should get back, the legends should be getting told soon." And with that Bella took his hand and went back to join the bonfire.

* * *

Everyone was quiet as Old Quil told the stories of their people. Though this was the thousandth time hearing it, Leah was still just as enraptured by them as she was the first time. Her mind started drifting and she thought about how in the future the stories of their pack would be told. How they allied with the cold ones to defeat the newborns. And then she thought about what would be told about her. The only (maybe first by that point) female wolf to ever phase. They would speak of her bitterness over losing her love to an imprint and probably would paint her as a villain. She wondered if she'd be given a name. All the females in the legends seemed to be nameless even the _third wife_ who had an important role in the stories.

Leah stopped listening to Old Quil and imagined how her story would be told. She'd be a defiant bitter harpy who couldn't let go. The only exception to her bitterness would be the son she had with her past love. They would speak of her unexpected transformation and ability to defy an alpha order. She'd be painted as something to fear or admire. She realized that her story was still being written. That what she does today and then on out would dictate the end of her story, her legend and what light it'd be under.

Normally that wouldn't faze her. The elders had done more than enough for her to not care about their approval, but this is generations of people who she'll never meet to gain an opinion on, but will automatically be forming opinions on her. She didn't want to be infinitely known for the rest of all time as the bitchiest person to ever exist.

Billy finished up the last story and everyone who wasn't asleep was getting up. This alerted Leah that the bonfire was ending. The beach was clearing out and only the elders and pack remained. They would have started the meeting soon, but they had to wait for Jacob to return from dropping off Bella. Leah decided to use this time to stretch her legs and take a walk.

She was about five miles out heading up the hill of one of the cliffs when she heard Sam. She stopped and waited for his heavy footsteps to come to a halt. Normally she would be heading in the other direction especially considering their last interaction together, but Leah had conceded long before she made here that she was actually going to have to be civil with Sam for anything to get accomplished. With a heavy sigh she faced him.

"What?"

Sam was a little taken aback by Leah's tone. It wasn't as harsh as he expected. He actually expected full on rage that resulted in fatal wounds to come to him, but no she just sounded tired.

"I…uh…wanted to talk to you alone."

"Never would have guessed." Leah deadpanned. Sam gave a loud exacerbated sigh to her response. Leah rolled her eyes. "What did you want to talk about alone?"

"Our son." His voice was a little quite when he spoke, but he was still loud enough to be clear.

"My son. What do you want to know about _my son?_ " Leah's harshness was back, but not at its fullest.

"You can say that all you want, it doesn't change the fact that he's my son too and I want to know how he's doing." Sam's voice raised a decibel. He hated having to go through such hoops to get even the slightest information about his kid. "You know this imprint didn't just screw you over, it had its negative effects on me too."

She rolled her eyes. "Oh like what? Like having an eternal bond that pretty much guarantees you'll never be betrayed. Having the elder's and pretty much everyone in the pack on your side because you imprinted. That automatically absolves your sins, in their eyes at least." Her bitter side was showing and she wanted to reprimand herself for it. She didn't want to be this person for all of history, but Sam Uley was her catalyst. He was the only reason for any bitterness and having him stand in front of her and complain about something he caused wasn't something her anger could resist. She felt tears of anger welling up inside her

"Like not having a choice. Like not knowing that if some mystical magic hadn't existed, would I still be with my fiancé? Would I have even given her a second look and could we even last without it? Like not ever being able to leave this reservation and being the reason that the person you love most will never be able to reach their full potential. And worst of all, having every vow I made to myself broken with one look of the eye. Leah, it's not all lollipops and rainbow on my end. There were consequences, but I can't dwell on them 24/7 or even at all because that might lead to worse ones that end up hurting more people than I already have."

Leah was crying at this point. She hadn't really thought about it from his perspective nor did she really care because no matter how bad it was, he would never wish the imprint never happened. She would always wish that, wish she had the life that they planned, wished that Daniel could have a two parent home filled with the love and care like she'd grown up in. Instead only got the beautiful child and she was determined to hang on to the only thing that the imprint couldn't tarnish.

"If you could go back in time and stop yourself from ever phasing, stop yourself from even imprinting, would you?" Her voice was low and cracked from crying.

"Honestly, if you'd asked before you came back I would have said no because it wouldn't let me think otherwise. It wouldn't let me think about the negatives other than hurting you. But now, now that I've seen, felt that there are things more important than Emily. Yes, yes I would change it. I would pick my freewill."

Leah gasped a little. Never had she imagined that he would ever want to take it back. That's why it was so infuriating, to know that he didn't regret betraying her. She didn't know how to respond to him. So she just did what she did best and left. She wandered around the beach for 20 full minutes before she realized that talking to Sam wasn't what she was here for. She promptly redirected her route back to the pack meeting.

When she made it back to the group, she was met with several impatient faces. She normally would have said sorry, but they weren't worthy of her apologies, at least not until they apologized themselves.

The elders were sitting in a row in from of the fire and the pack was scattered in front of them with their imprints in tow with the exception of Claire for obvious reasons. She took her spot standing in front of the elders when Billy spoke first.

"Nice to have you here Leah, we appreciate you coming." He said a nod.

"I didn't exactly have a choice. Bodies are showing up in the woods, this war is getting near. I can't just neglect my duties and leave them unprotected." She was surprisingly calm when she said this.

"We're well aware of the situation. It seems that they're sending a message."

"Yeah, well message received."

"Indeed." He cleared his throat. "So Leah, we as a group, want to apologize for not having any faith in you. We were worried and we took it too far. You have more than proved your ability to control your wolf. It's just that after Sam, we didn't want to even risk another tragedy."

From what Jacob had told her earlier she had expect this, but whether or not they meant it still remained to be seen. Leah chose her next words wisely because she didn't want to get stuck on this particular subject for long. She had actual things to discuss and this was trivial as far as she was concerned. Plus she had to get back to her babysitter in time.

"Thank you Billy. And while I may not forgive everyone this instance, give me time and maybe it'll come."

"Fair enough. With that out of the way we would like to discuss how you defied the alpha order."

While Leah had on some level been expecting this question, she hadn't quite formed an answer. Mainly due to the fact that she honestly didn't know and that's what she told them.

"Surely you have some idea how. What exactly happened when you did it?"

"Umm Sam was telling me to leave Daniel and I couldn't. I felt pain, like crippling pain, but I fought it and won. After that things eased, physically and emotionally."

The elders were nodding their heads along. They didn't know what to get out of it, it didn't prove or disprove Seth's theory.

"Okay. Next we would like to discuss you coming back. We would like for you to come home immediately, especially your mother." Sue's face reflected her anxiousness to have Leah back home.

Leah froze for a second because she realized she had changed her mind on this decision. While staying at the Swan's was not ideal, especially since she was in the target of the war's home, and she had missed being home; coming back didn't feel like the right decision. She needed to be around, be a part of the pack in order to fight, but she didn't need to live here to do it.

"No. I'll go on patrols, come to the meeting and fight when the war comes, but no, I'm not coming home." She spoke even and calm with no trace of anger.

"Leah, you belong here with us, we miss you." Sue spoke up. She had been staying quiet and letting Billy handle thing, but she couldn't stay quiet about her daughter refusing to come home.

Leah faced her mom with a sympathetic look. "I know mom and I miss you too, but I can't comeback. Not now, not yet." She looked out at everyone as she spoke her next words. "Though you guys separating me from my son was the main reason I left there were other reasons. Reasons that haven't been solved and until they do, I'm not coming back."

The quiet atmosphere broke at Leah's announcement. Raised whispers could be heard around the fire, Old Quil was the only one who spoke up loud enough to be heard. "If this is about Sam-"

"It's not about Sam. At least not the way you're thinking. It's about always feeling like everyone's against me here. I don't feel comfortable in my home. I don't feel safe or that sense of security that home's supposed to give you and until that changes, this is not my home." She made sure not to sound angry in order to get her point across. She didn't want to be dismissed as being over emotional, like she had been before. They needed to understand that whether or not she was being too sensitive, that this was not how you treated you family.

The elders were taken aback by her statement. They had no idea she felt like this, they just assumed she was she bitter and needed to get over it. The pack wasn't too surprised, consequence of being stuck in her head. They were, however, at a loss at what to do. There was really no way to rectify this with anything other than time.

Leah felt this meeting was over, at least as far as her involvement went. "I'm gonna go. I have to pick up Daniel from the babysitter. Just call me from the Chief's to get in touch about the patrol schedule." And with that she left them to their own devices.

* * *

She had made to Angela's right at 11:00. Her parents were asleep like Angela said so she tried to stay as quite as possible when knocking. She almost thought Angela didn't hear her until she heard her exit her room.

Angela opened the front door with Daniel asleep in his car seat in one hand and the diaper bag on the other shoulder. "Hey." She whispered with a smile.

Leah smiled back taking Daniel and her stuff. "He, how was he?"

Angela smiled wider. "Pretty much exactly how you said he would be. You're right he's an easy baby. Wish the twins were half as easy when they were babies."

Leah made a face. "Ugh, I can't image taking care two babies at the same time, I struggle enough with one."

Angela laughed. "Yeah it was a challenge, but my mom had help from me and my dad and sometime a whole flock of church members." Angel suddenly realized what she said might be a sore spot for Leah and winced, but Leah didn't seem fazed, she just laughed along with her.

"Yeah, help does make things easier."

Angela looked in her driveway and couldn't see a car, and found that odd. "I don't see a car, how did you get here?"

"Oh I walked; I don't actually have a car."

Angela looked surprised by this bit of information. "Wow, you must be exhausted. Wait here for me to get my keys. I can drive you home."

"Oh no that's not necessary. I'm actually not that tired at all, it's not that long of a walk."

"I insist. It's not that big of a deal and like you said it's not a long walk, so it won't be a long drive." Angela gave a genuine smile and went to get her keys.

While the drive wasn't long, it did take an unnecessary amount of time to get the car seat in and out of the car. When Leah was all set to go inside Angela gave her parting words. "I can help you anytime you want. All you need to is call." And with a wave goodbye she drove off.

Leah smiled at the car as it got farther away. She usually doesn't take to the overly nice type, but Angela was different. She was sincerely nice because she was and not because she wanted people to think it, which was rare. She's glad she met her. Bella may have terrible taste in monsters, but the humans she had a good eye for, at least that's what Leah discerned.

* * *

Sam had been missing from her side for ten full minutes when she decided to go looking for him. It wasn't like him to disappear for longer than that unless he needed to be and now was not one of them. She was able to figure out the general direction he had gone due to the string that attached their hearts. She was about 50 yards away from him when she heard Leah yell.

"Oh like what? Like having an eternal bond that pretty much guarantees you'll never be betrayed. Having the elder's and pretty much everyone in the pack on your side because you imprinted. That automatically absolves your sins, in their eyes at least."

She stopped for a moment before realizing that Leah and Sam were having a fight. She was about to get up to them and break it up when she head Sam's words.

"Like not having a choice. Like not knowing that if some mystical magic hadn't existed, would I still be with my fiancé? Would I have even given her a second look and could we even last without it? Like not ever being able to this reservation and being the reason that the person you love most will never be able to reach their full potential. And worst of all, having every vow I made to myself broken with one look of the eye. Leah, it's not all lollipops and rainbow on my end. There were consequences, but I can't dwell on them 24/7 or even at all because that might lead to worse ones that end up hurting more people than I already have."

She was immediately taken aback. She never thought of imprinting like this, she just saw as the thing that took her best friend away. But she got a new one, so it wasn't that bad. Everything was worth i's price in the end as long as she still had Sam. She never thought what life would be like without the imprint, it hurt too much physically.

"If you could go back in time and stop yourself from ever phasing, stop yourself from even imprinting, would you?"

She did mean to eavesdrop, but honestly she really wanted to know the answer. He would never answer with complete honesty if he knew she was there.

"Honestly, if you'd asked before you came back I would have said no because it wouldn't let me think otherwise. It wouldn't let me think about the negatives other than hurting you. But now, now that I've seen, felt that there are things more important than Emily. Yes, yes I would change it. I would pick my freewill."

Sam's answer hit it with a sharp pain in her heart and she felt like the wind had been knocked out of her. She wasn't strong enough anymore, if there was any more so she headed straight back to the bonfire, well stumbled more like it.

When he came back to her side she had composed herself enough to make it through the rest of the evening without him knowing. The meeting was eventful, but she wasn't paying attention to most of it. She just kept thinking about what Sam meant by freewill. It hadn't felt like her freewill was taken, it felt like love. But what is love without the freewill to do so, the ability to choose who you want to be with and not told by something on the outside.

This was the thought that plagued her right up until she fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know there are probably a lot of errors (that's with me editing!) I'm not the best at catching them all. Hopefully when I have a little more time I'll go through it and fix the one I can find, but I really wanted to get all the chapters up here so that I'm fully updated on both sites and then next chapter I post will be up to date here.


	14. Motherhood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leah gets a surprise visitor, but this time welcomed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So this chapter is beyond late (understatement) and that's for a couple of reasons the first one being that when I started this chapter over a year ago I was about halfway through when my computer decided to update itself while I was in the middle of writing and I lost everything except for the first paragraph and autosave completely failed and that left me way too frustrated to continue because I just got too mad thinking about it. While it did give me a chance to change some of the things I wasn't 100% happy with I also lost some good work that I wasn't quite able to recreate. The second one being life and not in the 'I'm too busy way', but the 'I'm not that motivated to do anything' kind of way which isn't that great of a reason but happens. Every time I sat down to write I'd either get stuck on a minor detail or just write around in circles, but here it is finally. Sorry for this long author's note. :\

The sounds of Daniels screams could be heard throughout the Swan residence and it seemed like there was nothing Leah could do to calm them. She'd fed him, changed him, burped him, put him down for a nap (despite him having just woken up from one) and anything else she could think of, but he still kept crying which was really out of character for him. Sure he cried when he needed something or was just plain unhappy, but he was always easy to calm down. The only other time he'd been this fussy was when he was sick with pneumonia which had her worried he was sick again, but his temperature was fine, he wasn't coughing and despite his refusal earlier he was eating fine. There was nothing to indicate that something was wrong besides his constant crying.

Leah was sitting on the couch with Daniel in on one side resting on the arm of the couch and on the other side a baby book lying flat on the seat with Leah furiously flipping through it trying to find the answer. She might have found the answer earlier, but Daniel refused to let go of her when she tried to put him down in his playpen and with him screaming right next to her ear she was finding it very hard to concentrate on the words in the book. For all she knew she'd found it already, but was too distracted to comprehend it. She wished she could just call her mother and she'd have the answer for sure, but they currently weren't speaking at the moment and Leah didn't want to give up her stance without having at least done anything in her power to solve the problem on her own. Plus, Leah realized, she would have been dealing with this completely alone anyways if staying in Oregon had panned out.

Leah took a break from the book and focused on soothing Daniel It calmed his screams to a more acceptable decibel but he was still unhappy nonetheless. He seemed like he was in some type of pain, but Leah couldn't pinpoint where; he had none of the usual symptoms of being sick. Holding him close to her had calmed his cries to pitiful sobs. She rubbed his back soothingly and kissed his forehead and then got back to the book. The moment her attention shifted away from him he let out an outraged cry making her cringe from the suddenness of it.

"I know sweetie, but let's try not to damage mommy's hearing alright?" Her voice wasn't as soothing as it should be, but that was the most she could control it. She went back to the book more determined than ever. She was going to get to the bottom of this and he was going to quiet down everybody was going to be alright. Or so she told herself.

Daniels cries seemed to get even more indignant making it harder than before to concentrate on anything before. She was so distracted that she didn't even hear Bella walk into the living room.

"Hey!" The sound of Bella's voice startled Leah so much that she nearly hit her, but when she realized who it was she calmed down. She was wearing tattered sweats a pencil in her messy hair and an annoyed look on her face that Leah could relate to. If Daniel wasn't her son and she didn't love him so much she would have bailed an hour ago and let someone else deal with him, but she was a mother and mothers (at least good ones) don't do that.

Leah turned to face Bella and let out a frustrated sigh. "What do you want?"

Bella let out a frustrated sigh herself. "I don't know world peace, a cure for cancer and some peace and QUIET." She never realized how hard it was to ignore a baby crying. She would have turned music on full blast, but that would have been counteractive. She wanted quiet and the music would not only have increased his cries but also added more noise to the house. She had finals to study for and despite her plans to not go to college, she wanted to at least graduate in this life before she started her new one. She wanted to see her parents proud of her one last time before all ties were cut from them. "Could you please find a way to quiet him down so I can study?"

Leah was taken so aback by Bella's assertiveness that she _almost_ forgot to get angry. But once the shock wore off the anger seeped into her in waves; she had to control her breathing in fear her wolf would come out. "Who the hell are to ask my son to shut up? And more so, what the hell makes you think I haven't been trying to do that for the last two hours?"

Bella looked at Leah with a blank face as though she had just realized what she'd done. She didn't mean to come off so rude and ignorant; it was just that she was so frustrated that she'd had enough. Normally she would have gone to Edwards, but she knew no real studying would have gotten done with him around. "I'm sorry; it's just a little difficult to concentrate when all you can hear is a screaming baby _even_ with headphones on and despite popular belief, I do want to graduate high school."

"Well, you make a hell of a case," Leah says snidely and turns back to the book. Still getting nowhere in her effort to focus on the words Leah turns desperate. She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath and turn to Bella who is still standing next to her probingly. "Alright, if you really want Daniel to stop crying you're going to have to help me." She feels the bile rise in her stomach at the thought of not only asking for help but asking for _Bella's_ help.

Bella looks at her timidly, "Oh-kay, how can I help?" She lets her words out slowly.

"You can hold him and take him to the other room while I search through this book and figure out what's wrong with him because apparently, maternal instinct is failing me right now." Her voice cracks a little.

"Okay," Bella says wide eyed as she takes the baby from Leah apprehensively. She walks to the kitchen bouncing him up and down muttering, "It's all going to be okay." That didn't give Leah much hope, but she needed a moment to herself.

When she's alone she takes several deep breaths to hold back tears. She feels utterly useless, her son was crying and a book was the only hope she had to calm him down. She hears Daniel's screams pick up in the kitchen and Bella's plea _that everything's going to be alright._ She takes that as her cue to keep searching. She starts with the table of contents which had titles so infuriatingly vague that she decided to search aimlessly until she had a page that could help her. If all else failed, she'd just go to the emergency room, but she didn't want to deal with the looks from nurses and doctors and plus worked there.

She had finally stumbled on to a section called _what your baby's cries mean_ when she heard a knock at the front door. She let out a growl of frustration.

"Bella, can you get that?" Leah yells.

"I'm kinda busy," Bella yells back uncertainly and then Daniel's screams start to sound out right indignant. There's another knock.

Leah puts the book face down and gets up ready to yell at the person on the other side of that door. When she opens it the person on the other side was the last person she expected. "What are you doing here?"

* * *

Emily had just gotten home from the store. She happily puts away all the groceries that'll surely be devoured in the next 48 hours and walks upstairs with one small bag and the egg timer in tow.

After overhearing Sam and Leah two weeks ago her entire world had been shook and for the first time since the imprint, she was actually worried that Sam might one day be able to leave her. The amount of pain he was in over not being able to see Daniel rivaled the pain he felt when he was away from her. It wasn't as strong, but it could get there. He could get tired of the pain and give into whatever demands Leah would have for him and surely one of those demands would involve him leaving her.

Had this been a year ago when this whole imprint started that wouldn't have been such a terrifying prospect, but now—now she was nothing without him. She gave up her job, her house, her _dignity,_ her life _,_ all to be with Sam. It seemed like the best move, the _only_ move and since he was her soulmate for life she had seen little risks in doing so, but now she needed to secure her future and she knew exactly how to do it.

She walks into the bathroom and takes her items out: three pregnancy tests—extra just to be sure. Her period was a day late—not much to be concerned about, but she was hopeful. She only uses one first as to not be wasteful—she'll need the others at some point again if this one's negative. She follows the directions to the T and sets the timer and waits. Before the timer can go off she hears Sam come home.

"Em, you home," he shouts from the stairs.

She starts scrambling to hide the boxes and its contents—she hadn't discussed a baby with him yet, she hoped to already be pregnant for that conversation so he couldn't say no. She can hear him come up the steps, but then he abruptly stops—she hears another voice, Jacob's and then his steps get farther and farther away from her. She lets out a sigh of relief and starts putting things away in a more organized fashion and hides the under the sink and sets the timer to zero hoping Jacob keeps him distracted enough not to notice the noise—she'll look at the results later. She starts to descend the stairs when she notices that Jake and Sam seem to be in a serious conversation. She motions to go back up but decides to stay where she is and listen in.

* * *

Bella had never held a baby before, it's something that never came up. Neither of her parents had siblings, so she didn't have cousins younger or older than her to be around and her mother taught Kindergarten where the children were well past their infantile stages. To say she was nervous holding Daniel was an understatement, but she didn't have a choice—Leah was scary enough in a neutral mood let alone frustrated.

She stood in the kitchen bouncing him up and down—she saw that on television all the time—and it seemed to do nothing, but anger him more. He was apparently not in a mood to move around so she sat in one of the dining room chairs and just held him close while rubbing his back gently. She figured babies were like people and found comfort in the same things—plus her mother used to do that for her when she was a toddler and was in one of her particularly grumpy moods. It helped a little bit but he was still crying.

She pulls Daniel away from her a bit and looks down at his red tearful face. She never actually seen him this close—his cheeks were chubby and though his face was scrunched up she couldn't help but see how adorable he was. "Awe it's alright," she rubs his back a little more firmly and instinctively presses a kiss to his chubby little cheek. His crying stops and he looks at her with wide eyes mouth gaping open. She feels as though he can see straight through to her soul by the way he looks at her as though he knows everything about her. She knows it's ridiculous, but something about the expression on his face makes her think he's more perceptive than his age suggests. His tiny mouth forms a smile and she can't help, but smile back, but then his face starts to scrunch up turning his smile into a grimace and then his screams fill the house once again.

She tries rubbing his back and kissing his cheek again, but it seemed that was a one time deal. She really hopes Leah gets back soon—she answered the door ten minutes ago and hasn't come back since. He lets out a particularly indignant cry and it startles Bella. "Ahh, your mommy will be back very soon," she repeats that like a mantra, hoping that it'll get her through. She's never held a baby before, but right now she doesn't think she'll want after and if everything goes according to plan she'll never have to. That last thought sits with her a little too uncomfortable.

* * *

"What are you doing here?" Leah says that more hostile than she means to.

The guest at the door was slightly taken aback by her tone but stood her ground. "Is that any way to greet the grandmother of your child?"

Leah felt guilt seep its way into her system. "No, sorry Allison," she steps outside and closes the door behind her. "How did you find me?"

"People talk Leah—how _wouldn't_ I know where you were?" She gazes off into the forest for a moment before gathering her thoughts enough to speak. "You know my son was never quite the same when he came back. He was always on edge, the slightest thing set him off into an angry fit—I was afraid he was starting to turn into his father, but then he left you for your _cousin_ and I thought things were getting better. I may not have approved of it, but he was happier, less on edge and the way he seemed to look after her after her accident calmed me from every thought of him being like Joshua, but he still wasn't my son. I don't know what that girl did to him, but he seemed even less like he was before—things just didn't seem to matter to him like before, college, you, _me._ I saw my son less and less the more she integrated herself into his life and the way he was after you left—" Allison's eyes started to water. "It was like we'd never existed to him before and I couldn't help but think _no wonder you left, no wonder you did to your parents what he did to me_ because I could barely stay to watch it myself." She looked at Leah poignantly as though she could see every bit of pain she'd been through.

Leah looks away from her uncomfortably. "Yeah well that's all good and nice, but is there a reason that you're telling me all this."

"I was getting to it. You've changed too having to watch the man you love change right before your eyes, see him with another woman, bear his child and not once did you ever think to come to someone who might understand what you're going through. I could have helped Leah, I've been exactly right where you were—he may be my son, but that doesn't mean I condone everything he's done. And then to come back with my grandson no less and not once did you think to come by and let me meet him." Her tone was severe and had Leah shrinking back. "I waited for you to come by giving you the time you needed, but then you never did. Instead moved out here with people you barely know acting as though _I_ never existed either."

For the first time since learning she missed her father's funeral, she felt truly guilty for her actions. She thought all the people she'd hurt to get away from Sam were well worth it because they were guilty too, but Allison, she'd done nothing to earn her resentment. Never once did she stick up for Emily—in fact she was one of the main people in La Push that looked down on her—never once did she stay on Sam's side and never once did she treat Leah like she was child crying over losing her new toy, but never once did she talk to her. Leah thought that because of the break-up she had lost rights to his mother too, so it didn't really occur to her to talk to Allison about any of it. In fact in her effort to forget all things Sam, Allison _didn't_ exist to her anymore, so why would she go to her—why would she let Daniel meet her if she'd already decided that Daniel didn't have a father.

"Alright, so I've been a bad person, but that still doesn't explain why you're here and now. I've been back for three months, here for one. You had other opportunities _before_ I left to come and see me. Why specifically today did you decide to come see me?"

"I thought today would be a good day to especially stop by."

Leah looks at her perplexed by what she means by "especially" but she lets her in the door anyway.

They walk in to find Bella rocking the baby back and forth mumbling to herself. Alison immediate walks over to her and takes him out of her arms. Bella looks at the older woman relieved that someone took over.

"Awe is this, my grandson," she coos as she bounces him up and down. "Why are we so fussy today?" She stares over at Leah expecting an answer.

"I don't know he's been like this all day. I've tried everything, but he still keeps crying." There's a hint of desperation in her voice.

"What is he about six months?" Leah nod in response.

"Ahh, he might be teething, have you checked his gums?"

Leah feels a little embarrassed she didn't think of that. In fact, it was the most obvious answer. She shakes her head.

"Bella would you mind getting a clean wash cloth and an ice cube.

She jumps up from the table to retrieve the items Allison asked for. When she comes back she almost trips. She smiles wryly at her, "thank you, dear." She wraps the ice in the wash cloth and gently puts it in his mouth. He's indignant at first, wary of this new foreign object, but when the cold hit his gums and relief starts his cries quiet down to whimpers.

Leah watches in awe as her son's grandmother expertly calms the baby down. She feels a little inadequate, and worse about not contacting her she would have been there, she would have helped and now she realizes that she was never as alone as she thought.

* * *

Charlie hears a soft knock on his office door and shouts, "Come in!" Sue creeps into his office timidly. Normally she's not this shy, let alone around Charlie, but today was a special day and he was the only person who could give her the information she needed.

He's just finishing up some paperwork sent from Seattle when he looks up to see who walked into his office. His features immediately soften when he sees who it is. "Hey, Sue," he gestures to one of the chairs in front of his desk for her to sit in. She complies and sets her stuff down next to her. "What brings you here?"

"I think you know why I'm here Charlie."

"I do, but I need to hear the word from you."

She clears her throat. "Alright, how's Leah?"

He pauses for a moment thinking about what to tell her. Should he leave things out or tell her everything. He settles with the truth. If it were Bella he'd want someone to do the same. "She's fine for the most part or at least what I can tell. I can tell she's not completely comfortable—always walking on eggshells no matter how much I try to reassure her I'm not going to kick her out. She misses you."

That piqued her interest. "She said that?"

"Not in so many words, but I can tell it from her face. She misses home which is probably why she's having such a hard time settling—she's still living out of her suitcase like she's ready to leave at any time."

Sue nods her head in thought. A heavy feeling washes over her. "Do you think she'll ever forgive me?"

Charlie leans back uncomfortable with the emotional turn this conversation went, but he answers anyway. "She needs time," he pauses before continuing. "But you're her mother and nothing is going to change that, so just give it time."

Small smile forms on her face "Thank you, Charlie." She motions to get up, "Can you do me a favor?"

"Anything."

"Give this to Leah." She hands him a bag with tissue paper coming out of the top. "It's her birthday and I don't another one to go by without me getting her something."

"Of course, Sue. I'll make sure she knows who it's from."

"You don't need to do that, in fact, don't, I think she'll be less receptive if she learns it's from me."

* * *

Sam had problems of his own, big problems, such big problems that he didn't have the time or energy to deal with anyone else's problems, but that sad look on Jacob's face stopped him from sending him away. Granted he felt the kid needed to get over it, but if the past has taught him anything it's that people move on at their own pace and telling them to get over it isn't going to help. So he let the kid talk, whine about Bella and how she was throwing her life away, literally and how he's tried everything to get her to see that. That's where he stops him.

"It's not up to you to get her to see value in her life. In fact, it's not up to anyone that's something she needs to realize completely on her own."

"I understand that, but how can she do that when she has that leech manipulating her? How can I get her to think for herself? She keeps clinging to him like he didn't hurt her and she won't call him out on any of it because she's too afraid to lose him again." He could hear the desperation and frustration in his voice. He could understand the feeling—it was always hard to try to save someone when they won't do anything save themselves.

He sighs as he thinks about the best way to phrase this. "She needs to realize that she's not the same person she was when they left her and she needs to stop clinging to a past that's not coming back. It's why she can't let go. I had to learn the hard way to let go when I first phased. I wanted so badly to cling to my old life, Leah." He cuts himself off thinking back to that time. He couldn't help but notice the parallels between him and Bella, and the foolish mistakes they both made clinging onto something they couldn't have back. "I wasn't her Sam the moment I phased. I held onto her as much as I could, and fate did the right thing. I'd been lying to her and would have had to continue lying to her and that was eating away at me, but the universe gave me an easy way out and I took it. I won't say it was the best decision because I obviously could have handled it better, but nothing good in life is ever easy. Bella hasn't learned that yet, but with the path she's on, she will soon."

Jacob notices the shift—this isn't about him anymore, but he got the message all the same. He always knew she was stuck in the past and he was willing to wait until she got out of it, but now patience wasn't an option. The leech had screwed everything up for her and him. He sees she's not happy with him—the way the joy leaves her face every time she mentions him, the way she has to "asks permission" to go places. She's not happy and apparently content staying that way. He was at his ropes end on what to do, even going for unorthodox methods. He figured it always works for the guy in the movie, why not him? He obviously knew there was a difference between real life and movies and that day had made it painfully clear but it was what he was left with.

He gets up to leave before he remembers the real reason he actually came over. "Did you want me to take over Leah's patrol tonight?"

"No, why would I want you to do that?"

"Well, it's her birthday dude. I realized it earlier and thought giving her patrol on her birthday isn't exactly the best way to get on her good side and I'm free tonight."

"Oh, how did I forget? Actually, how did you remember?" Sam looks at him suspiciously.

He just shrugs. "I don't know? It's kinda hard to forget someone's birthday when you've been forced to go to their birthday parties since birth. The real question is how did you _not_ remember? She was your girlfriend for how long?" Jacob smirks at him antagonizingly.

"Shut up."

"Is that an alpha order?"

"No, but it can be."

"Careful, take it too far and I might just decide to take that title away from you."

"Except you and I both know you're not going to do that." Jacob concedes that he's right. He's 16 and already has too much responsibility.

"Where did we get on that patrol thing?"

"Don't worry about it. I'll take over for her"

"Alright, later man."

Emily waits one full minute before she decides to come down from her spot perched on the stairs. She isn't quite sure how to process the new information, so she opts for just ignoring it like she was supposed to last time. She really shouldn't be eavesdropping

* * *

Charlie gets home and finds Leah holding Daniel, Bella, and Allison Uley all in his living room watching TV. It's quite an odd sight for him especially since Leah and Bella didn't really seem to get along. This made things harder.

"Hey…"

"Hello, Charlie. It's been a while." Allison is the first to greet him.

"Yeah, it has. How are things?"

"All things considered, good. You?"

"Good," he smiles and nods and tries not think about how worried he is about Bella.

"Leah, can I talk to you a moment?" She hands her son over to Allison immediately and follows his into the den.

"If this is about me having someone over without asking, I'm sorry I didn't know she was coming."

"No, it's not about that."

"Then what is it?" Leah moves back on the balls of her feet nervously.

"I want to talk about your living arrangements."

She takes a deep breath in nervousness. She had always known Charlie's hospitality was going to have a time limit. "I can find somewhere else to go if you want."

"No, no. I just wanted to know what your permanent plans are. You've been here a month and you're still living out of your suitcase, you keep things unusually tidy for someone with a baby. If you're not going anywhere anytime soon I want you to settle in more."

"Oh," is all she lets out. In all honesty, she hadn't really thought about her future or permeant plans—she was basically living one day at a time. "Um…I don't know. I guess I haven't really thought of it. Actually, I thought I would be at home by now but that obviously hasn't happened, so I don't know."

"Well, you don't need to figure that out right this instant, but just tell me when you do."

"Okay, you'll be the first I tell." She motions to go back to the living room, but he stops her.

"Wait, I have something for you." He leaves the room briefly and then comes back with Sue's present. "Happy Birthday."

She looks at him confused. "Huh?"

"Happy Birthday," he just states back to her handing her the gift bag.

"Thank you, but it's not my birthday," she says taking the bag from him.

"Well according to your mom it is."

She starts pulling out the tissue paper until she gets to the treasure inside. She finds the hand woven baby blanket that had been passed down in her family. It was her mother's first and then hers, then Seth's and now Daniels. She felt tears pin prick at her eyes.

"I don't understand, my Birthday isn't until the 14th."

"Today is the 14th Leah." He smiles wryly at her.

"Oh."

* * *

Despite protests, Leah decided to go on patrol anyway. Daniel was safe with Allison and Leah had nowhere, in particular, she wanted to go. She had no friends or money, so it wasn't like she could do much. In fact had it not been for her mother she would have let her entire birthday pass without notice. Life had just been too hectic for her to keep track.

He patrol buddy tonight was Embry—their route took them around the perimeter of the reservation. They were both mindlessly running the route when he speaks.

_Happy Birthday._ He sounds genuine.

_Thank you, I guess._

_You're welcome._ He states simply.

There's an awkward silence before he decides to break it again.

_So how was your day?_

_You know we don't need to have small talk, right? Especially since we're not exactly on the best of terms._

_I know, but I thought we could maybe change that._

_Why?_

_Because something needs to change, You said it yourself._ He says earnestly.

She lets his words sink in. He's right and how does she expect anything to change if she's not receptive when they make the first move. She's not coming back to the reservation anytime soon, but small talk couldn't hurt.

_My day was interesting I got a visit from Sam's mom._

_Whoa, what was that like?_

_Enlightening._ She trails off.

She thinks back to the conversation from earlier. Sam didn't just leave her, he left his mother too. They were two sides of the same coin and now she had a growing list of people she could trust.

_I'm glad your day went well._

_Thank you._

The run around in silence again this time comfortable. She thinks back to when she was talking to Allison after she got Daniel to stop crying. She talked about being single mothers and the strain of being all alone. They also briefly breached the subject of letting Sam in her son's life. While Leah still felt she couldn't trust him she does realize the importance of having both parents in a child's life. That conversation had left her worried about what she'd doomed her son into. She didn't exactly have personal experience with a non-traditional household—she always had two loving parents.

She thinks about asking Embry, what it's like, but they just got to small talk. She didn't want to ruin what little friendship they had by rubbing salt in the same wound she always picks at.

Her worry is unfounded as he starts the conversation for her.

_It's not that bad. My life wasn't ruined by not have a father around especially since I never knew him. I don't feel like I've lost anything. Sure there are things I missed out on and I had to grow up faster than a lot of my friends, but it's not bad._

_Do you think things would be better if he was around or you even knew who he was?_

He takes a step back in thoughtfulness.

_Sometimes. Sometimes I think things would be easier that I would have gotten to spend more time at home instead of daycare or a babysitter. I think about him being the one to teach me about motorcycles instead of someone else's dad, but I can't change what already is._

_But I can._

_Do you think you should?_

_I don't know anymore._

They let things go quiet again—Leah in contemplation, Embry trying to give her the space they need. She was almost too deep in thought to not notice it. The sickeningly sweet smell that was definitely not a Cullen. They both stop in their tracks changing their course to follow the scent. Embry howls to alert the others. They don't know what they're going to find, but they're pretty sure it's not going to be pretty.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Alright so that was a lot this chapter I hope it wasn't too confusing. Also, tell me what you think of this chapter. Did I make Leah too soft? It's the projection in which I wanted her to go but it may be too soon? Anyways there are about 4 or 5 chapters left of this fic depending on if I decide to write an epilogue. I'm really hoping to finish this by the end of the year, but as I've basically shown in the past I'm terrible with deadlines and I start a three month EMT program in October that will be taking up a lot of my time then, so I probably won't finish it by then, but I'm trying to be optimistic.


End file.
